Why Kraft dropped the fight
To my older, more put together readers who don’t come in contact with the stranger parts of internet culture, Shipping is a term coined in the deep recesses of the internet. It essentially refers to fanfiction, usually romantic, where someone wants two characters to hook up. So like, Kirk and Picard getting hot and heavy. The internet is a weird place.
So Kraft and Goodell hugged it out and Kraft dropped his fight against the Patriots punishments. He will not attempt to regain the lost draft picks or the 1 million bucks. (Tom Brady’s appeal still goes on, unrelated, through the Players union, so his can still be reduced). Frankly he probably just realized this fight was getting bad and he had little chance of winning so he backed down to keep the peace. It was a little surprising considering the fight the Pats were putting up. Most teams when hit with accusations seem to pony up and admit things pretty fast, take the punishment and move on. The Pats were the only ones I’ve seen fight so vehemently as they did (Which might be due to the magnitude of the punishment, among other factors). But, whatever. Now some Pats fans think Kraft betrayed them or whatever and the tears just keep flowing. The scandal that keeps on giving.
You have to combine their names together in some idiotic fashion, like Genahill. And you have to waste your life arguing with people who ship Tannehill with other quarterbacks, because shipping is SERIOUS FUCKING BUSINESS!
Peytom is too perfect, both because people always ship rivals and because the names combine so cleanly.
Neck meets forehead in “GlenPey: Faceless”
Also, draw play has taught me of Rivdan and Kelschaub. Add in Flymnfarvegers and you have every starting Packers qb in my lifetime.
Should be Glenning. Or Mannon.
Don’t forget Ryanchez. That one’s so strong I’m surprised he didn’t trade for him.
Cue bad NFL ship names and general bad puns. Ready? Go!
That mouse over text is more disturbing than any shipping going on…
Dave, I expected you to give me a single when you got to the plate with this story, and you hit a fucking grand slam with it. Brilliant work.
I ship Richard Sherman and Colin Kaepernick. Kaep has more chemistry with Sherman than with any of his recievers.
Solid burn.
So that’s why they call him Ringless Rivers.
Kraft really had no other choice.
Kraft really had no other choice.
A court case would be pretty much unwinnable, and would turn Kraft into Al Davis II.
This article does a reasonable job laying out the reasons:
http://www.patspulpit.com/2015/5/19/8627375/deflategate-why-robert-kraft-had-to-give-up-patriots/in/7630144
Btw, panel 1 typo: persue -> pursue
I really think the background logo should be a rendition of TAWWMY FROM QUINZEE.
this feels like it was inspired by blacklist
GENO AND TANNEHILL LOOOOOOOOL YOU SIR ARE HILARIOUS
Not entirely sure why they’re in Buffalo at the same time though.
Congratulations Dave, by my count, you have now officially made more comics about Deflategate than this years Super Bowl.
I can’t tell if you are a bitter pats fan, genuinely surprised, or just pointing out facts for the fun of it. Of course I’ve made more comics about this. It’s been an ongoing hilariously stupid scandal that keeps dropping new nuggets of good material to mine from whereas the Super bowl is exactly one game. You can only make fun of one game for a certain period of time.
Bit of all three, really. It’s also hilarious to me that someone who constantly shits on the media is doing exactly what they claim to hate the media for.
You can’t stand stand talking about the nfl schedule when it’s released, and hate power rankings, but somehow this is riveting stuff that everyone needs to talk about. It’s exhausting. How about a comic about Odell Beckham jr. getting on the Madden cover? Talk about Tannehill’s new money fort! It looks like a team is gonna move!
I dunno man, use SOMETHING different as material. Two deflategate comics a week is boring.
The extra point is getting moved, Derek Carr might need hand surgery, Giants LT Beatty tore his pectoral and is out until November.
1: Two deflate comics a week? Something that has happened literally once, during the biggest point when it was relevant? Come on man.
2. A cheating scandal that has the entire league in an uproar is a far cry from power rankings and the NFL schedule. This isn’t the media being desperate to find a story in nothing, this is an actual news story worth talking about.
3. It’s the offseason. I’m not going to have a surplus of things to talk about, so I’m not going to turn away what great, current material is being given to me. Something like Tanny’s money fort (I’ve been waiting for Luck/Wilson anyway) and Beckham’s cover isn’t something that demands immediate attention, I can save it for the dryer spells. Sometimes waiting lets me develop a better joke, too. Also:
4. Sometimes my ideas for news stories don’t end up working as comics but as my KSK articles. I did an article on OBJ’s cover and Carr’s finger in just the last week.
5. You can relax, seems like the story won’t have any updates till we find out what happens to Brady so I’m done till then, and that will likely only get one comic, and only if it ends up being a funny result.
1. I’m just saying that it’s stupid. Meanwhile you get bent out of shape about New Jersey Giants jokes. You come on.
2. Lol. Your opinion on what deflategate is changes gears faster than a formula one, doesn’t it? “It’s stupid and overblown- NO WAIT IT’S A MASSIVE DEAL.” Jesus dude. Consistency is a virtue, and I honestly think you do it to fit whatever point you’re trying to make.
3. “Waiting to see how things develop lets me make better jokes. Now excuse me as I make a bunch of jokes about a story that keeps changing”. Kay.
4.That’s fair, I don’t follow your journalist stuff, or really know where. (I’d like to, for the most part I think your stuff is great. This shit has just gotten annoying)
5. Thank God.
Honestly this whole thing really is overblown and stupid yet still a massive deal. I don’t think it should have ever gotten this big, because deflating balls is a silly crime, but it has, thanks to both the media and Patriots fans resisting it. I mean some patriots fans spent their memorial day weekend protesting Brady’s punishment at Gillette. It is simultaneously stupid and huge. Almost stupid because of how huge it is. My opinion on it hasn’t changed more than once, and that was back when I thought it was a non-story but then reports came out that it had legs. At this point, it is a story. It’s become a massive story. That something as stupid as ball deflation has gotten so overblown and huge is a major reason why it’s so fun.
as for point 3, there is still a difference between this and something like OBJ’s cover. Long term evolving stories with different angles are fun to play with. Something like the Madden cover is extremely straight forward, which is actually harder to joke about because everyone makes the obvious jokes immediately which requires me to think about a unique angle, and that can get more difficult than you’d think. I will admit I’m enjoying this Patriots thing more than I usually would, but if it was happening to another team I’d probably still be more or less as bad about it.
My KSK archive is here:
http://uproxx.com/author/drawplaydave/
I always update once a week but lately it’s more like twice. Most of it is really silly but it’s just another avenue for gags that don’t quite work here.
Tebochez: the pairing that keeps on hooking up and breaking up like a bad soap opera.
I would really like to see Ryan Tannehill and Fort Toethumbs because have you seen his thumbs?
I didn’t recognize Robert Kraft without the blue shirt, white collar, and pink tie
Geno in the Tannehill. Sexy.
Aiking for a Bucking: A monotonous love story of a Cowboy and an automaton.
A good Shipment is always terrifying, you sir have nailed it
Mannaromo is my OTP.
The Greatest Game of Cataan Ever: Luck and the Packers OLine
Toeing the Line: Andy Dalton and Rex Ryan
Dragon Hunt: Margus Hunt and Joe Flacco
I wonder if this is why Kordell Stewart REALLY got nicknamed ‘Slash’…
I’m years late here, but going through the archives and this came to me and I feel it should be added. Two Sexys One Rexy.