The Real Villains
This was my attempt to chart each owner based on some cursory research you are about to read below.
I spend a lot of time here disparaging the owners. For good reason! Fuck them! But outside the standouts we all know and despise like Dan Snyder, Jerry Jones, John Mara, Stan Kroenke…how much do you know about some of the lesser-known owners? How much do you know about Michael Bidwell or the Glazers? Besides being billionaires, which is inherently immoral, which ones are possibly acceptable people or have spent less time trampling the rights of the common man in order to gain their fortune? Which ones are in it for the profits and which ones care about their team? Which ones are evil businessmen and which are dopey failsons? Let’s take a bit to examine the current list of owners and lay out their crimes and get to know them a little bit better.
I’m sure in my summary I will forget things or not mention certain problems each owner has, as I’m just one man researching assholes in my spare time and you might know the intricacies of your team’s vile head of state than I will figure out. Please be sure to bring up anything I missed and enlighten the rest of us of their crimes in the comments.
DAN SNYDER – COMMANDERS
I don’t have to say anything at this point. Dan Snyder is my most common owner target here, for good reason. He’s arguably the most transparently vile human being on this list. He’s not a failson, he made most of his money by being a ruthless businessman and is a first-generation piece of shit owner. I don’t need to list his resume, his controversies are the biggest section of his Wikipedia page. Dan Snyder is a fucknut of the highest order and every day he isn’t hit by a bus is a worse day for the people of earth.
CHANCES WE WILL BE RID OF HIM – Low. If his bullshit hasn’t gotten him kicked out yet, I don’t know what could. He’s 57 years old and every step he’s taken has been to exert more control over the team.
JERRY JONES – COWBOYS
I feel most of us also know Jerral Wayne Jones as the evil goblin he is and some might even rank him above Snyder as the worst owner. Jerry is like Snyder if Snyder was more competent and cunning. Jerry is basically an oil baron and evil businessman to the core, but he still comes from money. He’s well known for signing scumbags as long as they play football. He treated Tom Landry, and then Jimmy Johnson, like shit. He openly opposed the anthem protests more than anyone else. He’s been caught with strippers and god knows what other crap he’s done behind the scenes. He’s a control freak who even went to war with Goodell over Zeke’s suspension. He looks like a fucking goblin. The only thing you can really say in his favor is that there’s no doubt he genuinely cares about the Dallas Cowboys, and that passion has directly led to how disappointing they’ve been for 25 years.
WHAT YOU MIGHT NOT KNOW – He’s the originator of Personal Seat Licenses and Stadium naming rights. He’s also an owner of 75 Papa Johns locations. He also prefers Pepsi over Coke.
CHANCES WE WILL BE RID OF HIM – Jones is a pretty rough looking 79 and it appears at this stage his son Stephen is just as much in control as he is. I think there is a decent chance that in the next decade Jones could croak and leave us with his three fail children in charge.
JOHN MARA & STEVE TISCH – GIANTS
Mara’s reputation has fallen considerably in the past decade. I’d argue before the collusion scandal where he (the head of the Owners committee) charged Jerry and Dan money for disobeying an unwritten rule to keep cap spending down during the uncapped year, Mara was generally seen as a good owner. The collusion wasn’t a massive issue, as most of us hate Dan and Jerry and liked seeing them suffer, but it was a red flag that Mara sucks. Since then, it’s gotten worse, from how the team handled the Josh Brown fiasco to the general cosmic ineptitude of his hirings since he took over, to the new taunting rule basically being his doing. Mara is almost the perfect failson, a useless dummy who didn’t earn any of his money and who doesn’t seem half as competent as his dad. He doesn’t seem to be an evil businessman though and he does seem to care about the Giants, so really he’s just a stodgy old money dumbass who looks like a great blue heron with a balloon head.
WHAT YOU MIGHT NOT KNOW – the Giants are actually 50% co-owned by Steve Tisch, a Hollywood producer guy. So outside the very reasonable chance he worked with Harvey Weinstein he’s actually kinda interesting. He’s also technically a failson like Mara, as his dad was the one who bought into the team, not him. By all accounts, Tisch seems like the better of the two in charge of Big Blue.
CHANCES WE WILL BE RID OF THEM – as both are old money inheritors, the team will likely stay in their family’s possession after they kick the bucket. Mara is 67, Tisch 73, about average to below average in owner age.
JEFFREY LURIE – EAGLES
Lurie is probably the least evil owner of the NFC east, and is another movie producer boy. He’s a failson, comes from a very rich family and tried to purchase multiple NFL teams before finally nabbing the Eagles. Lurie doesn’t seem to have any known skeletons that I can find and his worst crimes as an owner have been some meddling and a few poor decisions. The Eagles have largely been quite successful under Lurie. Lurie is also fairly invisible as an owner, he doesn’t nab headlines or come out of the shadows much.
WHAT YOU MIGHT NOT KNOW -He technically has two oscars, as a producer
CHANCES WE WILL BE RID OF HIM – Not terribly high, he’s 70, the Eagles are doing well and nobody seems to think too harshly of him
ROBERT KRAFT – PATRIOTS
Rub it out Rob was probably high on the list of “good owners” until we found out about his Tampa Tug job. It was one of those things we all just sort of assume these old rich white men do but having it confirmed, and having it be in a pretty dumpy little spot really made it funny. His massive coverup to keep us from finding out more proved his evil. Kraft is the evil businessman type who is in charge of his own company (Kraft Group) he founded to keep track of all the stuff he buys. He’s into private equity, which should set off all your alarm bells for evil practices and takeovers. For the most part, Kraft likely had a good reputation because he got lucky with Belichick and Brady during his tenure as owner. He’s also been good at keeping his nose out of the business and letting smart people make decisions.
WHAT YOU MIGHT NOT KNOW – Putin may have stolen one of his super bowl rings
CHANCES WE WILL BE RID OF HIM – Kraft is 81, higher in age than a lot of the other owners, so he might bite it the next time he’s tugged too intensely.
WOODY AND CHRISTOPHER JOHNSON – JETS
Heirs to the Johnson & Johnson fortune, both Woody and Chris are easily identifiable failsons. A lot more is known about Woody, who also seems like the worse of the two. Chris came out in favor of players protesting the anthem and offered to pay the fines of any player who got hit with one for protesting. Chris was the main owner of the team from 2017-2021 instead of his older brother, because Woody somehow became the US ambassador to Britain. Woody is a big conservative ghoul who was buddies with Trump, raised all kinds of money for republican political candidates, and likely got the ambassador job because Trump liked handing out gigs to his unqualified friends. Looking at the state of the Jets over the years, both these guys seem pretty bad at football and more interested in making cold hard cash.
CHANCES WE WILL BE RID OF HIM – Woody is 75, but Chris is only 62, so the Johnsons are probably going to be around for a while. They’ve owned the Jets since 2000.
STEPHEN ROSS – DOLPHINS
Ross is a real estate developer. Do I have to go into detail about how those people are ghouls? Ross seems like a dope when it comes to football as the Dolphins have largely been a pile of shit since he took over. The recent Brian Flores scandal and apparent attempts to woo Tom Brady just made him look evil in addition to stupid. He’s also a big Trump guy.
WHAT YOU MIGHT NOT KNOW – Ross and his firm are the people behind the Hudson Yards development in New York City, aka the rich people blocks built around that stupid beehive-looking thing that already featured multiple suicides because apparently nobody at the design firm realized a tall structure with basically zero preventative guards would be an easy place to jump from.
CHANCES WE WILL BE RID OF HIM – Ross is 82 and his main interests seem to lie elsewhere, as the Dolphins seem like a toy to him that makes him money. I think he’s a pretty good candidate for someone who will sell the team within a reasonable timeframe.
TERRY AND KIM PEGULA – BILLS
Always be wary of any owner who owns multiple sports teams. Owners of multiple sports teams are almost always in it for the dough. The Pegulas also own the Sabres and some minor league teams. These two are currently trying to hustle the city of Buffalo for a new stadium and threatening relocation but the real fun begins when you realize how they got their money. Fracking! He’s worked for oil and natural gas mining so you know he doesn’t believe in climate change. The married couple took over the Bills when Ralph Wilson died in 2014 and seem to view the Bills as a business venture. While the Bills are looking good now, the Sabres…woof.
WHAT YOU MIGHT NOT KNOW – When I looked them up Kim is 18 years younger than Terry, and they got married when she was roughly 24 and he was roughly 42. Every relationship is unique and they’ve lasted a while, but that’s the kind of age gap that would make anyone suspiciously squint a little bit.
CHANCES WE WILL BE RID OF THEM – They seem to be heavily invested in a western new york sports empire and are fairly recent takeovers trying to build a new stadium, so they’ll probably be in charge for a while.
ZYGI WILF – VIKINGS
Besides having the best name and second-best mustache among NFL owners, Wilf is definitely up there on the evil businessman scale. He took the twin cities to task to pay for his fancy new stadium. He’s a real estate developer and owner of multiple sports franchises. It’s even worse when they own franchises in multiple cities (He also owns the Nashville SC and Orlando City SC). Unlike many owners, we actually know some dirt on ol’ Zygmunt! He and his brother were found guilty of racketeering and fraud, screwing over their fellow real estate development business partners! Swell guys, these Wilfs.
WHAT YOU MIGHT NOT KNOW – His parents are Polish Holocaust survivors.
CHANCES WE WILL BE RID OF HIM – He’s owned the team since 2005 and already got his new stadium. He’s 72, so I think Zygi will stick around.
VIRGINIA HALAS MCCASKEY – BEARS
A failson (faildaughter?), the eldest child of George Halas. The Halases have basically been The Bears since inception and we don’t know a lot about them otherwise. This is a case of Old Money. The Halases seem fairly hands-off but not particularly smart. She ruined Soldier Field by turning it into a UFO. The Bears also haven’t been particularly great at business.
WHAT YOU MIGHT NOT KNOW – Virginia is the longest-tenured owner in the NFL.
CHANCES WE WILL BE RID OF HER – She’s 99 years old. She’s gonna be dead any second now and for all we know, already is and is getting the weekend at Bernie’s treatment like Queen Elizabeth. Her family will likely stay in charge of the Bears but since they’ve been a mediocre operation for decades now it might not stick with them.
SHIELA FORD HAMP – LIONS
Faildaughter heir of the Ford (and Firestone!) fortune. Shiela is a fairly new owner as far as control goes as she took over for Martha Ford in 2020. The Lions have been a disgrace of an organization for pretty much their entire tenure so only time will tell if Shiela can fix that mess but she seems to be off to a reasonable start.
CHANCES WE WILL BE RID OF HER – Not likely. The Lions have been the Ford family’s plaything for quite some time and since Hamp just took over two years ago, it’ll be a while before we see any changes here.
OBNOXIOUS CHEESE EATING DIPSHITS – PACKERS
Obviously, the Packers are unique here. In a way, they are the best ownership situation in the NFL by miles, and something we should all aspire our teams to be. On the other hand, Packers fans are very annoying, so it evens out. The team is operated by a board of directors and currently, former player Mark Murphy functions as the “owner” representative. I couldn’t find any dirt on him.
CHANCES WE WILL BE RID OF THEM – While we will unfortunately never be free of Packers fans, this is a situation that all teams should aspire to reach. We should get more publicly owned teams for all sorts of reasons, including the fact that it’ll get all those cheese fans hemming and hawing about how unique they are to shut the fuck up.
MIKE BROWN – BENGALS
A true failson. Mike Brown is the son of legendary owner Paul Brown and is also very well known for being cheap as shit. He’s the only other owner that functions as General Manager (along with Jerruh) The Bengals have been a joke for most of his run as an owner, but might currently be overcoming that mess, so who knows. They are due for a stadium upgrade but I don’t see Brown moving the team.
CHANCES WE WILL BE RID OF HIM – Brown is 86, on the older side of the owners. Considering he’s technically football royalty and his daughter Katie is the vice president, Brown will likely stick around till he croaks but I think the team is sticking with Katie. Katie Blackburn has spent her life in football, so I don’t see her selling.
JIMMY AND DEE HASLAM – BROWNS
Lmao. Putting aside the morally bankrupt Watson deal, the Haslams have been a disaster since they took over. He is both a failson, a corrupt businessman, and a moron. His company, Pilot Flying J Truck Stops, got raided by the FBI. He demanded the Browns draft Johnny Manziel because a homeless guy told him to. The football mistakes the Browns have made have been the stuff of legend, from the Sashi Brown mess to Freddie Kitchens to Hue Jackson. Just a smorgasbord of laughs from this dope. Dee Haslam is also a faildaughter, so don’t let her off the hook.
CHANCES WE WILL BE RID OF THEM – The Haslams are on the younger sides of ownership (67 and 68) so in terms of age they aren’t a risk. They are also new owners, which likely points to them sticking around for a while. But the Haslams have been such a disgrace so far that I wouldn’t put an early sale past them.
STEVE BISCIOTTI – RAVENS
Probably considered one of the “good” owners. The Ravens have been a very well-run organization since Steve took over from Fart Model (Shart Modell?). He’s not a failson but a successful ground-up businessman in charge of Allegis Group, a talent management firm. Seems like running a talent management firm translates into picking the right people for the job. He seems fairly hands-off with the Ravens. I couldn’t find any real dirt on him.
WHAT YOU MIGHT NOT KNOW – Steve grew up in my hometown of Severna Park, a sleepy nothing suburb of Baltimore that has somehow spawned an NFL owner, multiple professional baseball players, and my dumb ass.
CHANCES WE WILL BE RID OF HIM – Steve is only 62 despite owning the Ravens since 2000. I don’t see him going anywhere. As far as owners go, he seems like a top 3 case.
ART ROONEY II – STEELERS
Old Money. Like John Mara or the Halases and Fords, this is just the current owner in a long line of family football ownership. He’s run the team since 2003. The Steelers are a well-run organization and the family seems to have no other interests. Art also seems mostly hands-off, letting smart people do smart things.
WHAT YOU MIGHT NOT KNOW – This is actually fairly well known, but in case you didn’t, Art Rooney and John Mara are related by family marriage and that is where the actresses Rooney Mara and Kate Mara come from. Talk about privileged children.
CHANCES WE WILL BE RID OF HIM – The Rooneys aren’t going anywhere and I doubt anyone in Pittsburgh wants them to.
ARTHUR BLANK – FALCONS
Passing knowledge of Blank made me think he was one of the better owners. Players seem to like him. He clearly cares about the team. The Falcons spent a billion dollars on a new stadium, but it’s actually pretty cool? And they notably price their concessions much better than they need to. But the public still paid for the Goatse Dome and suffers under the cost of PSLs. Blank is a businessman who made his money being the co-founder of Home Depot, and Home Depot has it’s share of big store exploitation stories, although Blank retired from the job in 2001. It seems like Blank might be a decent person as far as billionaires go, but that’s a low bar.
CHANCES WE WILL BE RID OF HIM – Blank is 79, so he’s up there, but he also seems invested in Atlanta sports (he also owns the MLS team). He’s probably sticking around for the next decade.
DAVID TEPPER – PANTHERS
He’s a hedge fund manager who reportedly had brass balls on his desk. He seemed like an upgrade from the old anti-players union pervert that was Jerry Richardson, but now? He just seems like a dipshit businessman with no idea what he’s doing. He’s currently being sued by the state of South Carolina. Mr Brass Balls had his real estate company declare bankruptcy. He gave Matt Rhule 7 years and millions to suck total ass and trade for Sam Darnold. Tepper doesn’t seem to get football and seems like your average businessman in the game for the dough. He might still be better than Richardson, but it doesn’t feel like a good upgrade.
CHANCES WE WILL BE RID OF HIM – He’s “Owner Young” and just bought the team not long ago, he’s not going anywhere anytime soon.
GAYLE BENSON – SAINTS
Gayle took over the Saints after Tom Benson (a buttmunch) died. True to their religious name, the Saints helped cover up sex crimes by the Catholic Church. That alone rockets them towards the upper tiers of evil owners. She ran an interior design business that got served 18 times. She got accused of racism. She inherited the team and Tom’s fortune after Tom had a falling out with his family. Some skeletons are falling out of the closet here.
CHANCES WE WILL BE RID OF HER – She’s 75, midrange, but since the Benson family had the dramatic falling out, I think there is a reasonable chance she sells the team when things go poorly now that the golden age for the team is likely passed. Might not be immediately, but this smells like another down-the-road sell.
THE GLAZERS – BUCS
The ownership of the Bucs is between a whole slew of Glazers since Malcolm Glazer died. So, a whole room full of failsons. The Glazers are probably better known for their ownership of Manchester United. Their reputation on that front is very poor, and if you google reasons why the Glazers are bad, almost all of it is stuff about ManU. Most of the Glazers evil though is just inherited trickle-down evil from the late Malcolm. Seems like he was in it for the money all along and I assume the kids are too.
CHANCES WE WILL BE RID OF THEM – right now, ownership is split between 6 Glazers. I assume that number will cull itself over time, but the kids are young for owners. The Bucs just won a championship and upped their value so it’s not an immediate threat to sell at all, but I doubt all 6 stay owners over the next decade. My guess is the family will slowly split between the two franchises, and the losers of the bunch focus on the Bucs, who are less valuable.
JIM IRSAY – COLTS
Possibly the de-facto failson example. Irsay got all his dough from his daddy, best known as the owner who fucked over Baltimore in the mid-80’s and skipped town on the Mayflower truck. He’s had public battles with addictions and other problems and seems like a dope. However having a personal pill problem isn’t on the same level as covering up church sex crimes or anything Dan Snyder has done, and the team has largely performed under him. He loves the Colts (to be fair, it’s all he knows, he ain’t no businessman). The Andrew Luck injury coverup situation was pretty messed up though.
CHANCES WE WILL BE RID OF HIM – Irsay is only 62 and has been at the helm since he was 37. He’s not going anywhere unless he manages to find a way to piss away all his money on something stupid, which I wouldn’t put past him.
SHAHID KHAN – JAGUARS
Khan is a businessman and as time goes on, it’s clear he doesn’t care much about the Jaguars beyond them being an investment. If he does, man, is he dumb. Khan came into the league as a likable guy (for an owner) and has only looked worse and worse as time goes on. At first it seemed like he didn’t care enough about the team. Then he sold out for Urban Meyer, which ended up being the worst coaching hire in NFL history. He decided to keep Trent Baakle and a huge portion of the fanbase started portraying him as a clown. He made his money selling car bumpers and that very company has come under fire for workplace violations and environmental failures.
CHANCES WE WILL BE RID OF HIM – He’s only been the owner for a decade and he has a lot of money invested in various teams and sports, so he’s likely to stick around and also help his son run All Elite Wrestling. A future failson doing wrestling instead might force a sell down the road, but I don’t see it happening soon.
AMY ADAMS STRUNK – TITANS
Bud Adams would be high on the list of evil owners but thankfully he’s dead now. Amy is the faildaughter in charge. They need a new stadium soon, so things might go sour, but the fanbase, in general, seems okay with her from what I could tell. She seems more active in actually promoting the team, which they sorely need.
CHANCES WE WILL BE RID OF HER – I’m always leery of recent generational handoffs. Failsons might not be as equipped or interested in running a team, but Amy seems to be doing a reasonable job at this point.
JANICE MCNAIR – TEXANS
This little research project has showed me that actually a lot of evil olds have died in the past half-decade. Tom Benson, Bud Adams, Malcolm Glazer, Martha Ford, Ralph Wilson. Far more ladies in charge than I realized. It makes it hard to judge how evil they are since they haven’t been in charge long and spoiled failchildren and spouses don’t have the ruthless business history tracks to look up. One thing is for sure, with the recent news of how the Texans covered up the DeShaun Watson stuff and how badly that franchise has tailspinned in the past few years, Janice doesn’t deserve a good rep. Janice is Bob’s wife, so at the very least she thought he was worth marrying, which doesn’t seem great.
WHAT YOU MIGHT NOT KNOW – Another thing I’ve noticed is that on a lot of Wikipedia pages for these folks, it makes note of their philanthropy, and it usually amounts to paltry dollars to a billionaire as courtesy money to generic causes. In fact, Janice donated 5.5 million to a cause, and it is apparently one of the largest NFL owner donations ever. That’s…pathetic.
CHANCES WE WILL BE RID OF HER – McNair is 85 and Cal McNair, her son, already runs the team to the point where most people probably think he’s the owner. So she might not last long, but presumably, Cal will be next in line to suck ass. Cal probably had more to do with the Watson coverup too, so the Texans will likely be downgrading when Janice passes.
MICHAEL BIDWILL – CARDINALS
Chalk another one up to a recent old death, Bill Bidwill was in charge of the Cardinals from the 60’s till his death in 2019. Considering the Cardinals are the most woeful team in the league as far as franchise history is concerned, that’s not a point in his favor. Michael is the new failson in charge. He is a Trump guy, but I assume most owners are. He was a federal prosecutor, judge that how you will. It’s just hard to accurately judge failchildren as you don’t know if the crimes of the father were necessarily crimes of the child.
WHAT YOU MIGHT NOT KNOW – Behind the Bears and Giants, the Cardinals have been owned by one family longer than any other team. It’s astounding to be rich, you can run the lamest franchise in sports for 80 years with no real success to show for it and still be filthy rich and doing just fine.
CHANCES WE WILL BE RID OF HIM – Unlikely. The Cardinals are the family business and he’s a new owner.
JODY ALLEN – SEAHAWKS
Another recent takeover was due to death. Paul Allen was her brother, and there’s not a whole lot I can find on Jody. I do know you could possibly blame a lot of the recent Trail Blazers drama with Chauncey Billups and Neil Olshey on her. She’s also been a producer on some movies, mostly small dramas you haven’t heard of. There is some dirt on the company she operated (Vulcan), and she was accused of sexual harassment, settled, and stepped down. I want to applaud Allen for breaking the glass ceiling and showing that ladies in power can also abuse people.
CHANCES WE WILL BE RID OF HER – Very high. I wouldn’t be surprised if this is the next transfer of ownership in the league via sale. She doesn’t seem interesting in running the teams (Blazers and Seahawks) like her brother was. Bezos has been a rumored buyer of the Hawks pretty much since Paul died, though that might be just wonton speculation due to proximity.
STAN KROENKE – RAMS
Ah, here’s a good one for the acid bath. Kroenke owns a lot of sports franchises (The Nuggets, Avalanche, Arsenal, plenty more) and was the bastard behind the move from St Louis to LA where he then went and became Dean Spanos’s landlord. Kroenke is the big evil businessman and also failed upwards by marrying a Walmart heir. As far as evil sports tycoons go, he’s one of the worst.
CHANCES WE WILL BE RID OF HIM – Unfortunately low, especially with the Rams winning it all recently.
DENISE DEBARTOLO YORK – 49ERS
Contrary to what we might remember, Jed York isn’t actually the owner of the 49ers. Yet. Presumably, he will be soon enough. Denise owns the team mostly because Eddie DeBartolo went and did himself some white-collar crime and now can’t operate as owner. Since Jed York is basically the operator of the franchise and Denise is barely there, it’s hard to judge her directly.
CHANCES WE WILL BE RID OF HER – It’s only a matter of time before Jed York is officially in charge.
DEAN SPANOS – CHARGERS
A failson, a dipshit, and a loser! He took over the team from his dad, so he didn’t earn shit. He never managed to make the Chargers much of a name despite general team success in a very populous city. He couldn’t strongarm San Diego into a new stadium and quite possibly didn’t even genuinely try, just let the situation rot before slinking away to Los Angeles to become every LA resident’s 5th favorite local team. Stan Kroenke is his landlord. Spanos is apparently a bad businessman too, because despite the team gaining value in the move, his sister is now suing him saying he’s put the family in debt and has to sell. Imagine screwing over one city to become sloppy seconds in a different city and losing control anyway. Dean Spanos is a tremendous loser.
CHANCES WE WILL BE RID OF HIM – Well, if his sister is right and the family is in financial trouble, maybe we will be rid of him sooner than expected! Too late for San Diego, but it would be a bit of sweet justice.
ROB WALTON – WALMART
Our newest addition to the owners circle. A failson AND corrupt evil businessman. He’ll fit right in.
CHANCES WE WILL BE RID OF HIM – I don’t think his sale is even official yet, so unless they find the bodies, it’s going to be a long time.
CLARK HUNT – CHIEFS
Hunt isn’t very well known or spoken about much but he ticks all the boxes on the owner resume. Failson? Check, he’s the son of Lamar Hunt, the Chiefs founder, who was the son of an oil tycoon. Owns multiple sports franchises? Yeah, he’s into soccer, owning Dallas FC. Scummy business resume past? Well, he was an investment banker at Goldman Sachs for a bit, so you tell me. In terms of making good choices for the franchise, he’s been successful, but he also was okay with drafting Tyreek Hill, Kareem Hunt, and signing Frank Clark. He’s not the worst on this list, but there’s plenty to side-eye here.
CHANCES WE WILL BE RID OF HIM – Extremely low. He’s young, and the Chiefs are the family business.
CAROL AND MARK DAVIS – RAIDERS
Carol is Al’s widow and mostly just stays out of it, so Mark is the defacto owner here. Honestly, before the Las Vegas move, Mark was probably up there on the list of semi-respectable owners. He’s a failson, sure, but Davis had his pioneering good points and Mark was the least wealthy of all the owners. In fact, since the only recent number I can find is from 2015, he’s not actually a billionaire. That’s likely due to Carol still being alive and not yet passing her wealth down, so don’t get excited. But Davis is a weird guy, with his weird hair and love for Hooters. He’s spoken out against domestic abuse issues but also hired Jon Gruden so…eh? He seems to generally be on the right side of the flag protest issue, and he’s called for the release of the DAN SNYDER report while the other owners want to keep it hidden. He might not be great at finance, but outside the relocation of the team to Vegas and all the distaste that comes with such a thing, he’s actually not too bad.
CHANCES WE WILL BE RID OF HIM – I actually would have listed him higher risk to sell because he doesn’t seem great at financials, but the Vegas move likely helped him out and the Raiders are a family business, so unless he goes broke after momma dies, he’s gonna be the guy.
So there you have it. The current owners of the NFL. Some are truly evil. Some were born into evil and don’t know anything else, and others wanted in. Some are semi-decent people. All of them are old. If you have any stories to share, please do.
Paul Allen was pretty well liked in Seattle. He rescued the Seahawks from the disaster that was Ken Behring and kept the team in Seattle when it looked like they were about to move to LA. I’m sure he was evil as all billionaires are but he was definitely one of the better owners.
The fact that a team that protected and celebrated a rapist for like 20 years is the second least evil certainly says something about the league.
It also says something that my first reaction is, “Wait, which rapist?”
False allegations don’t make it true.
You know how it is, a lot of guys going around with 3 to 29 fake rape accusations levied at them.
y’know, it wasn’t until MY 20th fabricated rape allegation that i said to myself “man, these bitches be lying.”
I bet rape allegations make you like a player even more.
The amount of red flags you have to willfully ignore to defend Watson at this point is an entire field
But isn’t he defending ROFLburger?
Yeah, sorry, got my predator QBs mixed up
Or the fact that the “least evil” guy presides over the franchise that protected and defended a murderer (or accessory to murder or whatever semantics you want to hide behind with Ray Lewis) and a domestic abuser who knocked out his fiancee and then stepped over her like she was a poop on a rug, but asked for fans to “pray for him” when faced with the somehow much higher dilemma of “should I sign Colin Kaepernick?”. He also enabled both Brian Billick and Rex Ryan to have careers, so that’s gotta put you somewhere on a evil list.
There is a situation that could be *better* than the Packers. Force Snyder to sell the team, and let the Players buy it and turn it into a worker co-op. Then they can truly embrace their identity as the Commies by owning the means of production.
Seriously though, I feel like a team that is owned collectively by the players would be a really interesting experiment. When players retire, they can sell their shares to rookies who “graduate” into ownership, or they can keep a portion their shares and join the coaching/executive staff… if elected by the players.
Coaches and GMs get nominated and elected by players. TV and Merch revenue is shared. Personnel decisions are voted on. No one is cut or traded without majority vote.
Ted Turner tried to get the players to do this during a strike in the 82 and that made the owners cave. https://www.upi.com/Archives/1982/08/19/Sports-and-broadcasting-entrepreneur-Ted-Turner-and-the-NFL/7174398577600/#:~:text=Aug.%2019%2C%201982%20Sports%20and%20broadcasting%20entrepreneur%20Ted,games%20nationwide%20if%20the%20union%20calls%20a%20strike.
I would say I’m not surprise by the corruptness of these owners. Disgusted? Sure. Disappointed in these people after being enlightened? You bet. Money can bring out the worst in people. These sports organizations have made more cash than they know what to do with. Thank you for opening my eyes to how vile NFL owners are.
Terry Pegula needs to be much further to the left on this scale. We’re talking the owner who hired Rex Ryan FFS. If ou look at their “work” with the Buffalo Sabres it really hammers home that the Pegulas pretty much just lucked into finding McDermott, who brought in his own GM, who also happens to be a great find. The Pegulas are inept owners. McBeane is what drives Buffalo.
Good old Severna Park. I have no idea if it’s different than Severn and I live in the same state.
They should all be on the evil side, probably at least about two-thirds the way up
Also, Ross won’t willingly sell the team, but maybe the Brian Flores allegations can force him to. I wouldn’t hold my breath though, although the self-serving “optimistic” side of me thinks that the owners will prioritise the tanking thing over whatever’s going on with the Commies
Well the scale goes from evil to less evil so even the least evil owner on this chart isnt necessarily “good”
But the Packers fans are the standard for good, which means the average human being is the bottommost point of the chart, unless you think Packers fans are a particularly evil subset of people
Not to make this political but theres almost guranteed to be some pro fascist, January the 6th was a peacefull demonstration, Trump supporting racists amongst the Packers owners.
And the way I read Daves comment he didnt actualy say anything about their evilness at all, just that the ownership model should be aspired to and that Cheeseheads are anoying dipshits
I’m sure there are plenty of vile, scummy toerags within Packers fandom. I’m sure there are also lots of genuinely good, hard-working, charitable folk within it. On balance, it’s probably about average for any random grouping of people. Hence, them being so close to any NFL owner is, in my view, wrong
German fan has it right
The Packers ownership model is the ideal here compared to all these other people. I’m sure there are vile humans in that group as well as decent humans.
That pretty much describes Mike Brown to a T. Dumb as a jackass and about twice as stubborn, but its hard to think of anything evil about him besides greed. On the contrary, rumors are that he’s actually very charitable but unlike other owners, he doesn’t advertise it.
Katie Blackburn seems to be a better version of him. Its no coincidence that her taking more of a leadership role in the team and resulted in better success.
As for moving, I doubt it. The Browns value Cincinnati because they gave their father/grandfather his football team after he was kicked out of Cleveland. Also, Cincinnati is very laid back and the expectations aren’t high as other cities. They’ll only move if the city of Cincinnati forces their hand.
About the Woody Johnson ambassador bit, it’s (sadly) not uncommon to appoint political benefactors and/or friends to ambassador gigs. This particularly happens with ambassadors to countries which we have good long standing relationships with (like the UK) or ones that are mostly insignificant from a political perspective (Vatican City).
lol “boncos”
fuck arthur blank, seriously
also, look at all the old white men
regarding janice, it always amuses me when people fawn over “large” donations made by multibillionaires and herald them as the second coming
i get that we’re dealing in numbers that humans just didn’t evolve to intuitively handle, but a straightforward application of third grade math always—always—reveals that the donation amounts to the equivalent of a bad papa john’s pizza in the broader context of their overall wealth
literal pennies to them, but because we mortals can’t conceive of that many zeroes we heap unearned praises upon them
Wondering how many Man U fans have noticed you called them a franchise… ☕️
Except for Bidwill, they all voted for the Rams and Chargers move plan so they’re all in the positive evil space to me, even the Packers owners. Bidwill actually paid up for the charity promises that Kronke abandoned when he moved the Rams.
Didn’t Stephen Ross also vote against that plan? Or was it another one?
I think Stephen Ross was rumored to be the vote initially but the documents released with the Saint Louis lawsuit revealed it to be the Cardinals vote. Pretty sure the other “no” vote was Davis as he kind of got screwed initially.
Either way, Ross hired Saban so he’s not escaping the evil side.
No he didn’t. Ross bought the team during the Parcels era, which was two coaches after Saban
That’s actually a relief that I am actually ignorant of something in the NFL after having stopped rooting for any team in 2017.
Gayle Benson is fairly hands off as an owner. She is also owner of the Pelicans, so put her down for the multi-sport owners. The real power in the Saints org is Mickey Loomis, who is GM the Saints and executive vice president of the Pelicans and basically manages all of the business decisions dealing with the Benson sports empire. If Gayle is the evil owner, then Mickey is the consigliere.
Bidwill not only didn’t fire a GM who got a DUI and led the team to the worst record in the NFL, but then gave that GM a 7 year contract extension. He also used the Cardinals to stump for his old college buddy Kavanaugh to become a Supreme Court justice, so not only is he great at ruining a football team but is also great at ruining this country.
Wait, we’re not really giving points to Davis for demanding that the NFL release the Snyder Report are we?
Wanting it released is better than not, but with it unreleased and Jon Gruden taking all the hits, the main impact of the Unreleased Report is just to make the Raiders look bad for having Gruden. This reads completely like just wanting the Raiders out from under the crosshairs.
Again, wanting it released is better than not, even if his primary motivation is to expose other teams to scrutiny. Im in favor of that too, and he’s come out on the right side of a few other issues.
Reminder the chart is from Evil to Less evil, so nobody is good here
> philanthropy
IIRC Tepper does okay here, even if the most famous one was donating a ton of money to name his alma mater after him.
https://foundation.cmlibrary.org/news/tepper-foundation-gift/
https://www.panthers.com/news/david-tepper-foundation-donation-to-help-with-covid-19-response
> LA resident’s 5th favorite local team.
I think you’re forgetting the LA Galaxy and the Angels, even if we don’t actually count the Angels around here.
There’s growing unrest in Pittsburgh on Art Rooney II. Overall he’s still beloved, but ever since Dan died and give Art full control of the team, he seems to be increasingly cheap, most notably by not giving Tomlin a quality budget for his coaching staff. While there’s not any numbers released to prove this, I believe there’s enough anecdotal evidence to make this a reasonable claim, like Pep Hamilton choosing the shitshow of Houston over Pittsburgh in 2020
This is interesting, It’s hard to find any dirt on the Rooneys and Pittsburgh is such a close knit homer fanbase who doesn’t complain about ownership much
*monkey paw curls*
Now all teams are publicly owned… by packers fans.
One thing I’ve picked up is that while maybe on the low end of evil for the billionaire spectrum (as far as that goes), Arthur Blank is regarded by some as a terrible owner for being too loyal to his hires. This mostly came into view post-2016, when the Falcons started increasingly obviously needing a comprehensive overhaul yet Dan Quinn and Bob Patricia remained in place year after mediocre year. There’s some degree of comparisons to be made to Shahid Khan, who has shown similar traits — Khan kept around Doug Marrone after firing Caldwell, and kept Trent Baalke in place after getting rid of Urban Meyer, even though Marrone is mediocre and Baalke is a fuckstick. His expressed reason for firing Meyer was also telling — not because of the Jags’ terrible record but specifically because Meyer’s actions made him seem completely untrustworthy, Petrino style.
There’s certainly far worse ways to run a railroad, mind you, but it’s an interesting morality quirk to observe, particularly in people who by their nature as billionaires have to be ice-cold, ruthless businessmen who have exploited and destroyed people to get to where they are.
Jody Allen need to be moved farther left. Since she took over Vulcan, they have closed both the Seattle Cinerama, The Living Computer Museum, and the Flying Heritage and Combat Armor Meseum. All three have yet to reopen and FHCAM probably will never reopen because the collection was sold to Steuart Walton(yes THAT Walton family). Fuck Jody Allen.
I think this vastly understates Gayle Benson’s evilness and Terry Pegula’s dumbness, but with those two significant exceptions…spot on!
Martha Ford is still among the living, but she’s 97 years old. She simply handed off the active role to Sheila the same way Denise is letting Jed run the Claraniners.
Gayle Benson is like the definition of a GILF
About Tepper and South Carolina, that’s on South Carolina. Rock Hill shouldn’t have promised to raise a bunch of money they didn’t have.
One thing maybe worth noting about Lurie and the Eagles: A minor story this offseason was that his 26 year-old son now has an official position in the organization. So if we’re gonna have a millennial/borderline-Gen Z failson owner any time soon, there’s a good chance that it’s gonna be the Eagles.
Apparently Dave didn’t read about Jody Allen’s weird obsession with smuggling giraffe bones out of Africa.
https://www.seattlepi.com/local/article/Bodyguards-Vulcan-CEO-Allen-tried-to-smuggle-4317395.php
In defense of Zygi, he’s built a significantly better culture on the Vikings compared to the bush league shit Red McCombs did before and up to 2005. The Wilf brothers also made significant strides to make sure East Downtown got a proper revitalization in conjunction with pushing stadium parking underground, huge upgrades to the adjacent light rail station, and building US Bank.
That being said, you have every right to hate him for his landlord type shit and his racketeering.
>He openly opposed the anthem protests more than anyone else.
ZOMG. You mean he didn’t hate America enough? Pure. Evil.
The fact that morons like you still think taking a quiet knee during the anthem is just hating America really shows how good you are at just always willfully missing the point
Shad Khan is learning from his son Tony – he just invents his own Lombardi Trophy to win every year so Jacksonville is always champion.
In reference to Virginia McCaskey…going backwards into time:
George Halas Jr. dies under mysterious circumstances as he was set to inherit the team. His shares go to his children and some in a trust directed by Papa Bear.
Virginia harasses the children to sell, then Papa Bear dies in 1983. The rift in the family is seen in court documents reported at the time in the Tribune where it was claimed that Virginia never shared arrangements of their grandpa’s funeral with her niece/nephew. They end up selling out and it all gets whitewashed away by 1985. Disloyal to family? Winning cures everything.
After 85, she allows her husband to operate the team and this is where the nepotism starts. Ed McCaskey was behind the 1st for Rick Mirer, the firing of Vanisi, and the botch on hiring a replacement for Dave Wannstedt. As quoted in the wiki article on him: “I got to be a big shot with the Bears through some clever planning. George Halas had two children, Mugs and Virginia. I took one look at Mugs and I married Virginia, and that’s how I got this job.” With that quote, it makes me wonder how the circumstances align between Mugs’ death and him getting to be chairman.
Then it was the turn of his idiot son Michael to ruin th…I mean run the team. Michael didn’t like Ditka because Da Coach wasn’t going to bend the knee for this pantywaist. Winning in 85 allowed Ditka to dad-dick on Michael because who fires a SB winning coach? Michael finally gets to fire him in 1992 and enjoys the meddling of the team in the 90s culminating with his part in fucking up the Dave McGinnis hire and getting relegated to sitting in the chairman’s seat and nothing more.
During this time of the 90s, the Bears continued to stay pat as an org and not expand the non-player personnel base as many other teams had. Video coaches, more scouts, more people starting to crunch football numbers? We can’t do that we don’t have money for that! Little was it known though that this was due to Virginia’s want to own 100% of the franchise from all of the other failson partners that Halas had accumulated over the years. She finally bought back the other percentage of the team from those that had it and had it all! Except for, you know, any cash flow reserves. By the time Wannstedt was fired, the team in paper resembled a franchise that had been left in 1989. Virginia owned 100% of the Bears and was cash poor. Soldier Field was showing its age quite badly at this point, being a nearly 80 year old building that was already partially destroyed so the Bears could move in. They tried to strongarm the city but everyone now knew at this point that the team had no money to build their own stadium. Emperor Daley II had Virginia bent over his knee and none of her sons had any business acumen as to avoid it. So the great compromise of failure was struck. Soldier gets almost completely destroyed to build in more suites and box sections, the Park district owns it and builds some other additions out of the money outlaid get built nearby, the architecture is awful and doesn’t even make it to “bad clash” status and it is STILL in the bottom 5 stadia in the NFL for capacity. No one fucking won on this deal except Ted Phillips. Fuck Ted Phillips.
The team has a fever dream season in 2001 that truly was the miragiest of mirages seen outside of the Sahara. It comes crashing down with the construction move to Champaign and coming back to New Soldier doesn’t help. Angelo fires Jauron. Ed McCaskey dies. Angelo, after being pressed by Carson Palmer to draft him chooses not to and traded down from 4th overall. Yes that’s right, Carson Palmer WANTED to be a Bear. Lovie stiffens that defense and starts eating offenses alive again. We get Sexy Rexy and Dave Rappocio gets an inspiration. The McCaskeys are getting better in the cash flow situation so we expand *some* but not nearly enough and after the 2nd fever dream of the 2006 season he starts buying free agents like Julius Peppers. More poor drafting and a save-my-job hail mary of a trade that brings us Jay Cutler gets Angelo fired. It also gets Michael McCaskey fired and George McCaskey, the next failson in line steps forward. He hires Phil Emery and Marc Trestman as GM and coach respectively. It is later learned that he used some kooky tactics and questions during the interview process such as placing importance on how they handle media more than how they handle the football. He hired Trestman over Bruce Arians. Remember that. The team plays some of the hottest offense the franchise has ever seen and finishes 2nd in offense behind Peyton Manning’s Mile High Experience (TM). The wheels slowly fall off after that. Urlacher’s exit is ungraceful, Briggs ends up being the last man standing and seemingly gives up on team exercises (except games) and the locker room is devolving into extramarital bullshit after the Aaron Kromer scandal. Emery and Trestman are fired.
John Fox is hired to get the locker room back in order. Ryan Pace is hired because of his recommend from New Orleans and the aid of Ernie Accorsi. Because our Chairman George McCaskey, born into the footballiest of football families there is in the National Football League CANNOT VET FUCKING APPLICANTS BECAUSE HE HAS NO LEADERSHIP SKILLS OR BUSINESS ACUMEN AND RELIES ON TED PHILLIPS, THE FAMILY ACCOUNTANT, TO HELP HIM WITH HIRING DECISIONS. Anyway, Fox is Fox and Pace seems like a nice guy. The offense immediately regresses to the Wannstedt era. The defense is aging and slowly being replaced via signings and draftings. The team goes nowhere and Pace suddenly realizes the draft is coming. He’s looking all over that board for our big future from the #3 pick. It could be anyone! Deshaun Watson, Patrick Mahomes, or even Josh Allen. But he winces as the rumors swirl about teams trading up to get their guy at #2 just ahead of them. So he downs a viagra, puts on his big boy pants, and throws his dice at San Francisco. Got it! Secured the #2 pick! Now we can get OUR GUY……..MITCHELL TRUBISKY.
I wanna die.
He’s athletic, he’s got some good traits, but he’s unpolished and somewhat raw since he only started in college for 1 year. He needs coaching that is going to get him upward. Knowing our historical cheapness for expanding non-football personnel AND that we have no leadership acumen in the organization from the top down, this is going to be swell! Mike Glennon was signed this offseason and named the starter but we knew better. First 4 games goes 1-3 because the opponents were hard and because Jordan Howard is a fucking MAN (and the Steelers are somewhat cursed playing in Chicago against the Bears all-time. Their only win in Chicago vs the Bears was in 1995.) Enter Trubisky. He has happy feet, the receiver corps sucks 18 dicks and we lose a lot. Fox is fired. Enter….The QB Guru. Matt Nagy has a plan to fix the offense and make it good. And in 2018 it worked! The offense worked better, opposing defenses had to respect Jordan Howard, allowing time for long and complicated plays to set up out of a bootleg for Trubisky. But we couldn’t correct the Kicker problem throughout the season which came back to be known forever more as the double doink. Nagy then goes on to lose his god damn mind and scheme everything from then on as a pocket passing situation. Behind an offensive line that sucked so hard, wind turbines in Northern Illinois ran at maximum capacity on Sundays. And we traded off Jordan Howard, meaning that the extra attention the defenses had to focus to the run game was no longer present. Cue the Benny Hill theme.
Finally after the year of Cthulu 2021 Pace and Nagy are fired. Ted Phillips still exists. George McCaskey is still a failson who doesn’t want to improve. And Virginia is still alive. We have another new GM and Coach, and a still young highly regarded QB prospect who was drafted in the same vein as Angelo’s hail-mary-to-save-my-job which also failed for Ryan Pace. I don’t have much hope moving forward for the ownership of the franchise I watch, but then again; life is suffering. To live is to find meaning in the suffering. Go sports team. Fuck the Packers.
Thank you for this detailed writeup, I can feel your passion
I don’t know if I buy the hint that McCaskey killed Halas Jr in some power move but it’s fun to imagine
You can feel my salt, which has been approved by that yinzer guy from Youtube we both know.
Setting aside his sexual predilections and closeness to Trump, I do think Kraft deserves at least SOME credit for being one of the few owners to not have used public money to build his stadium or the surrounding complex.
He’s still a bastard, but I’d rank him a bit lower on the evilness scale.
It’s almost too bad the Walmart guy won the Broncos bidding, because I really would have enjoyed seeing Josh Harris’ “hedge fund investment, nothing more” approach applied to the NFL. Harris owns the Philadelphia 76ers (NBA) and NJ Devils (NHL), and I think has a stake in some soccer franchise somewhere.
The 76ers are the poster child for intentionally losing without shame (“Trust the Process”). And if they hadn’t lucked into Joel Embiid, they would be completely irrelevant except as a clown show – bad contract after bad contract, 5 GMs in 10 years, bizarre draft picks and trades, and even some of the most stupid promotions possible (see: NFTs and a failed contract with a “Metaverse” start-up company). Even their PR is bad: a few years ago, they tried to insist every one call them “Philadelphia” instead of “Philly”, since the latter was considered to be low-class and not sophisticated enough. You can imagine how well that went over.
The NJ Devils *are* irrelevant at this point. There is literally no reason to pay attention to them.
I can’t imagine the Broncos would have fared much better under Harris than his other properties.
As far as the Eagles as concerned, Lurie is one of those owners that falls into the “Mostly Harmless” category. We (the fans) complain sometimes that he isn’t active enough, then he gets involved for a while, and we tell him to butt back out. Jalen Raegor and a couple of other head-scratchers were almost certainly on him, because even his GM best-bud Howie Roseman wouldn’t have survived those decisions. Lurie managed to overcome some recent (mostly minor) criticism by announcing the return of the Kelly Green.
His failson Julian seems to be in line to take over, and at least has been (supposedly) taking actual business and sports management classes to prepare.
Regardless, Lurie is still 1000000000x better than previous owner Norman Braman.
Lurie to me seems like a decent owner who mostly stays out of it but occasionally acts dumb with his decisions (like the Chip Kelly thing and the recent team explosion) but I’d rather have him as an owner than any of the other NFCE guys
Ya know – around ten years ago I was an attorney at a small firm representing one of those fellow real estate plaintiffs in Jersey against the Wilfs in all those racketeering and fraud claims. I’ve seen the evidence and I’d never trust those boys with anything ever again. Nor will I ever bear (pun unintended btw) any good will towards the Vikes until ownership changes. And that my friends is all I will ever say here on the matter.
I have to imagine there is so much shit we don’t know about these people that some of them actually managed to be so bad they faced genuine consequences in a court of law like Zygi did, it must be rough
If Snyder gets hit by a bus, he’ll be a problem for the world he gets isekai’d to.
I’m surprised Dave didn’t mention Kronke being named after not one, but TWO St. Louis sports legends. Stan Musial and Enos Slaughter. The fact that he was brought into Rams ownership specifically so the team had ties to St. Louis, only to give his hometown a middle finger is something I still find hard to fathom today
Might not be news to you, but if Irsay blows his money on something other than pills it’ll probably be music memorabilia. He paid ~$4.5 million for David Gilmour’s guitar a few years back (Pink Floyd).
FYI on the Bears:
They will almost certainly sell the team after Virginia dies. It may take a couple years because they will also almost certainly move the team to Arlington Heights, but the rumor mill in Chicago is that there are potential ownership groups already forming up in anticipation of buying the team and moving them to a new stadium in the suburbs.
Nice chart. Not too much to argue with here. My only complaint is that Dean Spanos is far, far more stupid than he is evil. I think he still deserves to be in the top half on the far left, but somehow his proximity to Snyder and Haslam is disproportionate. How he handled the San Diego situation was certainly awful, but his actions were mostly driven out of stupidity; he doesn’t have a lot of evil history outside of that.
Also, calling the Chargers every LA resident’s 5th favourite local team is awfully generous. When they moved, they were more like 12th, behind a lot of local college teams.
JEFFREY LURIE – He’s complicit in all the bullying and assault eagles fans perform on visiting fans. He should be convicted for multiple accounts of assault.
ROBERT KRAFT – People often say he funded the stadium himself. Not true at all. He did get public funding. Only he paid it all back. Now where do I get a 0% financing loan? He also asked for public funding for his 60 million stadium wifi upgrade a few years ago. Boston told him to take a hike.
The PEGULAS – Robbing Taxpayers of a billion dollars, that needs to go to the top of the evil scale.
VIRGINIA HALAS MCCASKEY – Called Peyton Manning a “nice man” or something in some promo video. Can’t find it. But Peyton Manning is a known sexual predator. So move her high up in the evil scale or dumb scale.
Edit: Seeing someone elses post about her. Maybe the evil scale will do.
STEVE BISCIOTTI – Disagree, not a good owner, He tried to cover up the Ray Rice knockout punch. And tried to convince Ray Rice not to have that press conference with his girlfriend. Then when the video came out he cut Ray Rice out. Scumbag thru and thru. Put him up higher in the evil scale, much higher.
Gayle Benson – You cite the sex crimes coverup but you don’t put her straight to the top in evil scale? What the hell man? How’d you like to be sexually abused?
Jim Irsay – You have this dolt too low in the dumb scale
Stan Kroenke – Bought all the land around a lake in Canada to block anyone from using that lake because you’re not allowed to own a lake. The courts sided with him. A total piece of shit, but so is the government/law/whatever in Canada for upholding this ruling.
Clark Hunt – Take a look at his family history of sexual abuse and incest towards mentally challenged/disabled family members. Disgusting. That whole family needs to be put out to pasture.
Forgot one…probably forgot a few more. Well fuck! I should have noted this all down instead of recalling it from my brain!
Art Rooney II – Employs a Pittsburgh department officer known as the “eraser” to cover up crimes. Probably the reason the rapist Antonio Brown’s crimes only started getting noticed after he left the Steelers. Needs to go much much higher up in the evil scale. Straight to the top for this despicable behaviour.
I’d say this is pretty accurate! No complaints here.