The Dolphins Release Ndamukong Suh
Look I know a LOT of bigger, flashier shit has happened in the past two days but I wanted to make a Dolphins comic so Suh me. We’ll get to all that nonsense, we have a month and the hooplah should die down soon. You’ll get your damn Cousins money thing. Be patient.
So what is going on in Miami anyway? The Dolphins tend to swim under the radar simply because they are what we in the biz call “mediocre”, which means not good enough to be interesting but also not bad enough to be interesting. Even a year of Jay Cutler jokes couldn’t drag this team into national interest last year. So now they are stuck in this weird spot. They overachieved year 1 under Gase and then took a step back. Apparently that means BLOW SOME SHIT UP.
Suh getting released isn’t entirely unexpected. He’s good, but he’s gonna be pricey and he’s on the wrong side of 30. The most surprising move to me was trading Jarvis Landry. I’ll fully admit I don’t watch that many Dolphins games but like, isn’t Jarvis the kind of young talent you want to keep around? He’s a good to great WR, doesn’t seem like too big of a head-case, and entering his prime without any bad injury history. Well, then he became a Brown. RIP Jarvis Landry. At the bare minimum I would have expected more for him than a 4th and a 7th. 7th round draft picks are barely valuable and I don’t even know if they should count half the time. Basically a 4th. I think he was worth at least a 3rd.
They replaced him with 32 year old Danny Amendola, who I’m convinced they thought was actually just Wes Welker but sorta young again and not as good. I had to look it up but Amendola has been a Patriot since 2013, which shocked me since it feels like he just got there. Maybe it’s because he was hurt a bunch and also didn’t really do much, even for a team that loves small white dudes more than anything else.
I heard they might be looking towards QB in the draft too. Tannehill probably gets one more year to prove he can be more than painfully mediocre before he’s done.
The Dolphins seem like they have some sort of offseason mission, but so far it doesn’t make a ton of sense. I feel like they got worse. Then again, I thought the Bills got worse last offseason, and they ended up last year’s sacrificial 6th seed, so what do I know.
Let’s not forget how the Patriots played pin the tail on the locker to decide who to release and trade. Happy for Malcolm Butler who got wronged in the SB and will now play on the same team as Bernard Pollard did. Maybe he may also break Tom Brady with good coaching
The bills lucked into the playoffs last year, just like the dolphins the year before that.
Also the Suh puns are suhper overdone Dave…for god’s sake at least have the decency to warn us before you suhplex us with the puns.
Talib’s attempting to bait Suh with his ring.
What’s going on in Miami is that Tannenbaum is a worthless hack who doesn’t know what he’s doing. He’ll run this team into the ground just like he did with the Jets.
Fuck Suh
Joe Thomas retired.
Hey hey hey, let’s get it straight: The Bills lucked into the FIFTH seed :p
The Dolphins are more poorly managed than the Browns. At least the Browns have a semblance of a plan.
Yep, Jarvis Landry’s career is almost as dead as Nate Soldier’s and Jonathan Stewart’s.
Solder, not Soldier.
Vicioussoise
“so Suh me” BAHAHAHAHA now I can’t even be mad at you anymore
Why is Jarvis Landry smiling?
He gets to leave the team that traded their star player for a dust mite
Beyond fucked off with the Landry trade. I thought Ajayi for a 4th-rounder was bad, but this… a 4th-rounder this year and a 7th-rounder next year for a Pro Bowl-level WR who led the league in catches last season? Really?!
These morons would have traded Marino for Mike Ditka’s navel lint and a half-eaten bag of Doritos.
No, they would have given New Orleans Ditka a whole draft for Ricky Williams
I don’t know what the Dolphins are doing. I’m not seeing a coherent plan in all this.
The Non-pats AFC East teams seem to be on a 3 year
Year 1: Come out of nowhere for a 6/7 Seed (Jets 2015, Miami 2016, Bills 2017, Jets 2018)
Year 2: Massively underachieving expectations after year 1 (Jets 2016, Miami 2017, Bills 2018)
Year 3: Fail to tank with some of the worst talent/coaching in the league after a fire sale (Bills 2016, Jets 2017, Miami 2018)
Year 4-6: Fire everyone, repeat year 1-3
Year 7-9: Fire everyone, repeat year 1-3
We need him the most
(Suh)
I don’t see where anyone else mentioned this but…….” Dave kills people he knows in a comic “. Talk about sacrificial offerings. What did that guy do to you, Dave?
Delivered him papa johns