Sir Rex A Lot Drops Hot Fire
Are you ready for the Unsexy Rexy to spit hot fire?
I like big toes and I can not lie
My twin brother won’t deny
When a girl walks in with an itty bitty waist
And her ankles in yo face
I get sprung, wanna pull up tough
‘Cause I notice those pumps were stuffed
Deep below the jeans she’s wearing
I’m hooked and I can’t stop staring
Oh baby, I love your footsies
Wanna Rub those tootsies
My homeboys tried to warn me
But those piggies you got makes me so horny
Ooh, Metatarsals
You wanna put those feet in my Benz?
Well, kick me, kick me
‘Cause you ain’t got average feet, see?
I’ve seen them dancin’
To hell with romancin’
She’s sweat, wet,
Walking like a turbo ‘Vette
I’m tired of magazines
Sayin’ small toes are the thing
Take a Ryan bro and ask him that
She gotta pack much in those flats
So, fellas! (Yeah!) Fellas! (Yeah!)
Has your girlfriend got some toes? (Hell yeah!)
Tell ’em to walk it! (walk it!) kick it! (kick it!)
Strut those healthy feet!
Baby got Feet
Rex Ryan’s fire new LP Rhymes by the foot drops pretty soon, are you pumped for this revolutionary piece? Some other song titles:
Get Ur Feet On
Toes Yourself
Ain’t no half Steppin
Fuck da Toelice
Ankles outta Compton
Ain’t nuthin but a Heel thang
You down with Lil Piggies?
Fresh Prance of Bel-Air
In The Clogs
Because I got Heel
Ice Ice Pedi’s
Dave
you’re paying for my theraputic memory erasal procedure
Dave why….It’s so….Horrifying.
You think it’s creepy to rap it à la Sir Mix-A-Lot?
Try singing it like the Jonathan Coulton version.
This just made it so much better
LA face with the Oakland tootsies…
This is golden Dave, ignore the whiners. Wish you’d done something about the bar fight they were involved in a month ago tho.
Dave, total missed opportunity for “My anaconda don’t want none unless you got bunions, hun” other than that this comic is totally vomit enducing. You did well.
*inducing
Fuck the offseason
The doldrums of the offseason are finally making Dave crack. Though a remix featuring the real Sexy Rexy would probably be welcome.
I don’t know what to do with my life after viewing this
Dave imma need you to delete this quickly.
Another A+ alt text.
How could we have so many years of Rex as a headcoach and no one made this?
The purpose of this? Like a backstory? SOMETHING?!?!?
You are bad man! You make evil bad things!
I am gonna need so much bourbon to get this out of my mind.
Christ, man! Fuck! And you made him all sweaty! God dammit man, agh
I GET SPRUNG might be my alltime fav panel of yours.
Still, tho, the fact that he’s got a niche fetish and is totally unashamed about it only makes me like him more. Besides, it makes sense. Football is a game of inches… and feet.
“Fuck Da Toelice”
Aww you sick sonofabitch.