Peyton Manning Rides Into The Sunset
About goddamn time, and I mean that in the nicest way. We all knew it was coming. We all expected it to happen. We’ve been writing and discussing his legacy for months, even before the season ended. We waited for him to announce it after the super bowl win. It was getting to the point that I was beginning to wonder if he really was that stupid. I love you, Peyton, but you have nothing left to give. Maybe he held off to today because of some part of his contract that helps the Broncos if he waited this long or something. Whatever it was, he finally just announced it. It’s finally over.
Lets ignore the ugly thing that’s uncomfortably swirled around the past few weeks and just remember the great stuff.
I’ll miss him. I’ll probably still make jokes about him even when he’s gone. He’s the best QB I ever saw play the game. I’ll miss watching his feet go ten million miles per hour as he progresses through his reads and finds the open man almost every time. I’ll miss the stupid red mark on his forehead. I’ll never forget the moment I realized he spoke out of the side of his mouth, because I could never unsee it. I’ll miss watching him throw TDs constantly. I’ll miss how one time Bill Belichick went for a 4th down deep in his own territory just to try and prevent Manning from getting the ball. I’ll never forget that game many years ago against the Bucs when he got like 3 scores in 2 minutes to win it. I’ll miss when things go badly for him, and we get that glorious thing known as Manningface. And when he starts yelling at people in the sideline. I’ll miss turning off his games half the time because watching a robot systematically dismantle a bunch of outclassed defenses could get disturbingly boring at times.
As much as ESPN overdid it, I’ll miss his battles with Brady. I’ll miss that 2013 season when he seemed like an unstoppable monster. Except he was. I’ll miss his constant onslaught of commercials because honestly, I liked them. I thought his deadpan good ol’ boy vibe was nice to watch. I still watch his SNL skit with him abusing children from time to time for a laugh. Same with the laser rocket arm commercial. CUT THAT MEAT. I hate the Nationwide ads but that’s because they are terrible. The Papa Johns commercials are even worse. Bring back Mastercard.
Peyton is a legacy player. He was never the athletic prospect who could outrun you. He never had the strongest arm. He was just the smartest man on the field, at all times, even when his physical body started to disobey him. He revolutionized the game. He’s a first ballot Hall of Famer. Farewell, Sheriff.
What will u do when Elisha retires dave?
He probably would sob for days, eating bomb pops and watching both of the Giants Super Bowl DVDs on repeat.
That doesn’t sound like a bad evening.
Denver has won every Super Bowl (and made all but one of their Super Bowls), with a Quarterback drafted by the Colts.
Our only hope is for luck to be cut.
Just wait 7 years, Luck will be old, beard to his knees, known for his Pizza Hut ads, and in a tearful goodbye says hello to Denver, with Peyton Manning as the GM.
It all just happens again way down the line…
Peyton’s announcement reminded me of Mike Schmidt’s (Philadelphia Phillies) retirement press conference back in the day. He was all choked up during the whole thing, simply torn up having to leave the game he loved.
I was a bit frightened by the amount of time he took getting around to letting the world know he was retiring. I kept seeing stories pop up about him exploring possibilities with other teams. I thought, “how can he watch 10 seconds of that Superbowl game film and think, ‘I still got it!’?” Thankfully, he did the right thing. Sad to see him go, but it was time.
Dave, you mentioned Bill Belichick going for the 4th down… When Jeff Fisher was still the Titans’ HC, he had his team kick onside after every score against the Colts in one game. His reasoning: if we kick it deep, Peyton’s going to have the Colts at mid-field in 2 or 3 plays anyway, so why not give ourselves a chance to get the ball?
….Who is Mike Schmidt?
…I don’t know who Mike Schmidt is
..(Or Von Hayes, or Steve Bedrosian)
With that out of the way, I’m glad you brought up Fisher’s “gameplan” with the Titans. That was just bizarre, and one of my go-to examples of how he is not a great coach
Think of it Dave, now you can proudly say that your team has sole ownership of the best Manning still in the NFL. Cherish these moments…
Elway is the greatest horse the NFL ever came to know
While reading this comic I heard that song Renegades playing somewhere in the room.
It’s so damn fitting…
I’m curious to know how Manning is riding off west from Denver to Omaha.
Same here
No, no, he made his retirement announcement from Indy. :p
Needs more forehead.
Fivehead.
How the hell was Manning ever able to play in a dome with that forehead?
HIS TIE WAS BLUE
And now Calvin Johnson is officially retiring too.
So the first-year eligible nominees for the 2020 HoF will include Peyton, Jared Allen, Calvin Johnson.
Don’t know what to say about Calvin…maybe 2/3
Don’t forget Charles Woodson. I’d say him and Peyton are the sho-ins, the rest might have to fight for it
*facepalm* I can’t believe I forgot Woodson. Yeah, Woodson goes in.
I know we talk about this being a golden era of QBs, but look at the DBs that have retired in the last few years: Brian Dawkins, Troy Polamalu, Ed Reed, Champ Bailey, Charles Woodson. That is a positively terrifying nickel package right there.
Did Steve Smith retire this year? Because I really, really, really want him to go in. He probably doesn’t make it in his first try, but if there was ever a WR who played bigger than his already fine numbers, it was Smith.
Steve Smith’s giving it one more year in Baltimore before he rides off into the sunset.
I really hoped that no matter how far off into the sunset he trotted that his head never fully cane into view because it’s infinitely tall.
I just realized that you can sing “Lazer rocket blasting off” to the tune of the Nationwide jingle.
Oh man, I love that SNL skit, too!
“Spend time with your children so Peyton Manning doesn’t.”
Man I’m gonna miss those Peyton manning jokes and that forehead that’s taller than Brock Oswieler.
Well time to look for the sexy rexy
Sexy Rexy ended a long time ago.
Did… Did I just see the top of Manning’s head?
“I’ll miss how one time Bill Belichick went for a 4th down deep in his own territory just to try and prevent Manning from getting the ball.” I was in the Hoosier Dome (hey, RCA didn’t pay me anything so it’ll always be the Hoosier Dome as far as I’m concerned) in the upper deck on the Pats side of the field that day, right above the play. That was one truly awesome moment, when everyone realized the RB didn’t get to the marker. I thought the crowd screaming was going to make my ears bleed. Damn that was great … Did I mention that was awesome? 😉
I just wanted to say… This may be some of your finest work.