Leave Some For The Rest Of Us
The year is 2037.
It is the final season of the NFL. Years of lawsuits have gutted the sport. Infighting among the owners after the death of Jerry Jones has fractured the league. Fans have tuned into watching leagues like the Alliance of American Football, or not watching football altogether. The youth of America has started played other sports that do not cause brain damage.
The stadium is Khan’s Field in New Jacksonville. The game is over. The Old England Patriots have just defeated the Oklahoma City Saints, who are in year 3 of their new city after New Orleans was officially deemed un-salvagable from the rising water. It was a slugfest. The score of 78-67 is the lowest score in 3 years. The ratings will be remarked upon as the last great fizzle of the Netflix broadcasting company. It will soon be absorbed into the Amazon Government. Lord Bezos will finally have his prize after years old hold out.
The remaining 43 fans that haven’t left the 30k capacity stadium made entirely of infinity pools have gathered near the 50 yard line. The post-game ceremony has commenced. The Patriots are gathered around the stage, celebrating. Julian Edelman Jr hugs his family. Bill Belichick cracks a smile with the aid of his exoskeleton. Josh McDaniels, tears in his eyes, taps the number 87 patch on his jacket, worn to remember Rob “The Duct Taped Tight End” Gronkowski, who officially fell apart for good that offseason.
Roger Goodellbot 5000 rolls into position. After the celebratory speech, thanking the league and the slaved players, he hands the Lombardi trophy once again to Tom Brady, the greatest of all time. Winner of the last 7 straight Super Bowls and now in possession of 22 championships, Tom Brady gets the trademark gleam in his eye. He looks the same as he did 15 years ago. The TB12 method is working like a charm with the nanobots in his bloodstream. He hoists the trophy far above his head. He smiles broadly. Goodellbot holds the microphone up to Tom. Tom looks out at the crowd, and after a pause, he finally manages to speak.
“Nobody gave us a chance!”
do people still complain about how the NFL didn’t play Sweet Victory in the halftime show in this timeline
do people still complain about how the NFL didnt play the entirety of Sweet Victory during the halftime show in this timeline
Yes. Yes they are
Woo OKC gets a team!!!
I like this timeline
I oddly enough find myself wanting back story comics through out the off season to detail how so many of these details came to be. Also, this is still better than what we actually got.
Brady is Thanos.
I wish people would stop talking about how Sean McVey lost the game.
McVey says that because he’s the coach, and you have to take responsibility as coach.
There were 10 different plays were Goff just straight up missed reads. One was a play they had ran all season. And then another time where he missed a WR so wide open that he got bored waiting on the ball.
Hit just those two and you have 10 more points, the lead, and can take away some of the Pats run game.
The Pats offense was beat all night, but Brady hit one big throw into coverage.
Goff couldn’t hit the ocean from a life raft.
MCVay deserves his share of the blame. I agree Goff was trash and far too many people have absolved him of blame because the Pats D stifled them. When Goff had opportunities, he failed far more frequently then he succeeded. His throws were terrible all night.
But McVay never seemed to adjust the gameplan to help out his team. After a dismal first half they came out doing the same shit in the second half. Why not call for more short yardage high percentage plays to get chunk yards and midigate the pass rush? Why not make literally any adjustments? The Rams had to make changes when they were trying to just brute force the system on the Patriots, who had clearly found the formula to defeat it. McVay was severely outcoached and it absolutely affected this team’s chances.
At the same time, the Rams did the same thing to the Patriots and it didn’t look like McDaniels made any significant changes. White didn’t play more in the second half than in the first. They didn’t run screens or stacked routes to create quick hits. The Patriots just managed to brute force the Rams’ defense in a way the Rams couldn’t to the Patriots’ defense. Basically, the Patriots’ line held up just long enough on two consecutive plays to let Edelman and Gronk get behind the coverage.
The TD drive was McDaniels finally figuring it out. He put Gronkowski, Allen, Burkhead, Develin and Edelman on. The Rams needed to put on a big defense, or the Patriots could just smash the ball through on the ground. And then the Patriots went five wide and moved people around until they were comfortable with the matchups. It was something that they hadn’t practicated all year.
Goff was the biggest reason on the Rams side why they lost, but both teams’ offenses sputtered for the same reason: the defenses concentrated on taking away the run game. Brady was able to make one or two big plays despite not having the running game he relies upon and Goff wasn’t.
mcvay made adjustments in previous games which is why it was really weird he didnt do the same against the best team of the last two decades, and precisely why he absolutely shares some of the blame
oh fuck i srs posted ejectejecteject
You left out the part where Larry Baylor got arrested after he used more than one third of his full strength and touched the QB Jim Bowman. Because he touched him, Baylor was charged with rape and his career may have been finished. Heard they’re planning to make another rule change regarding that.
Part of me wonders if this is what 50% of NFL games would look like if the refs were too scared of being the story to call all but the most obvious fouls.
That was awesome. Dystopian sci-fi is your true calling Mr. Rappoccio.
This reminds me of a story by George RR Martin about the last Football match in history.
OK I know the picture is supposed to convey Brady with his foot on the desk (what with the toe rings and all), but does anyone else see Brady “holding the little guy down” with his left hand and you can only see the poor sucker’s foot?
Boi, i read through the comments section 4 times to try and understand the pic. I’m actually rofl rn.