JPP Can’t Handle Some Fireworks
Well, gotta reset the Beason clock
JPP never struck me as the smartest guy on the team but this is a new one. Fireworks accident, huh? Thankfully it doesn’t seem serious, some burns and maybe slight nerve damage in one finger. That’s no big deal to a D-lineman. You can always tell a guy who played pro football on the line because they will have at least 3 fingers that point the wrong direction. So he’ll be fine, but man, he’s dumb. Got franchise tagged, Giants gave him an offer he refused to sign, but now after this mistake he has basically two options: Sign the franchise tender and make much less money than he would have, or sit all year. Well it’s not like he can sign the thing now anyway.
Edit: HE HAD HIS RIGHT INDEX FINGER AMPUTATED LOL. GUESS IT WAS A BIG DEAL. Although some say he did it to get back on the field faster.
I’d say I feel bad for him but…I kinda don’t. Treat fireworks with respect and maybe you won’t lose out on millions because you’re an idiot.
I never fingered JPP as all that bright, but you gotta hand it to him if he doesn’t knuckle under. Still, he can go mano-a-mano with most guys, and blow up the rest; he’s just got such an explosive start that this could be his year to light it up if he can come to grips with what happened.
That… that was masterful.
Your comment is the definition of beauty
A+
GREAT. Now Dave doesn’t even have to WRITE the next comic 😀
You sir have officially won the comments section.
sniffs…Beautiful.
JPP is a masochist
And a “fantastic” representation of USF. Go Bulls
I initially read that as “manchild”, which works just as well.
Eil is an asshole
JPP = Buster
Yeah your right Dave, (SMH) go ahead and reset the Beason Clock… unbelievable!
I love how Eli’s popsicle regenerates from panel to panel.
Stupid football injuries make the world go round. Remember Derrick Mason breaking his wrist playing golf? My little known favorite: In his first season as Jags head coach, Jack Del Rio put a tree stump and an axe in the Jags locker room as a symbolic training metaphor to encourage players to “keep chopping wood”. Chris Hanson, his punter, required foot surgery after missing the stump and axing his foot. And of course there’s the classic Gramatica ACL.
Baseball players seem to do stupid injuries better than anyone else. John Smoltz burned himself while ironing a shirt that he was still wearing. Wade Boggs threw his back out putting on cowboy boots. Sosa threw his out by sneezing too hard. Kevin Mitchell needed a root canal after eating an overcooked donut. Terry Harper separated his shoulder high-fiving a teammate. Steve Sparks dislocated his trying to rip a phone book in half. Adam Eaton stabbed himself in the chest while cutting the plastic wrap off a DVD. My personal favorite: Carlos Quentin, while leading baseball with made what is probably the dumbest decision that any baseball player has ever made while still on the field: He punched his bat after striking out and broke his wrist. At least when you snap a bat over your knee, physics is on your side.
I love football more than baseball, but MLB players are the undisputed kings of stupid injuries.
while leading baseball with 36 home runs*
Forgot to finish that sentence. These comments need an edit function.
Agreed
How can you forget Glenallen Hill injuring himself by falling through a glass table while having a nightmare about spiders? C’mon son!
(Also the wood chopping one isn’t really “little known.”)
Chris Hanson also had second degree burns after a fire that was started after he and his wife (or girlfriend?) bubbled a fondue pot. That outstupids almost every injury ever (the Hill injury with the nightmares is also quite stupid)
That picture is so great I just blue myself
JPP has turned himself into the embodiment of Peter Griffin’s Mega Super Ultra—-POW.
There’s a report now that Bucs’ cornerback C.J. Wilson has lost two fingers in a fireworks accident.
Did the M80s have extra short fuses this year?
The report is now that his right index finger has been amputated…. Definitely ain’t signing a contract any time soon