It’s Been A While
The Bengals last playoff win before this past weekend was January 6th, 1991. I was 2 years old. I literally cannot remember being that old. There are people who will read this and have never actually existed when the Bengals tasted sweet, sweet playoff victory. The team was Quarterbacked by Boomer Esiason, the old guy on CBS’s halftime crew. The team they beat that day? The Houston Oilers.
It’s honestly kind of hard to fathom a gap that long without a single playoff win. There was a meme going around that nobody had ever texted about the Bengals winning a playoff game because text messaging was invented in 1992. That surprised me, I didn’t realize texting was that old. The Bengals last won a playoff game before the band Nirvana broke through with Smells Like Teen Spirit. The Bengals drought was older than mainstream grunge. Michael Jordan hadn’t won an NBA Championship yet. We didn’t know who Sonic the Hedgehog was. Almost my entire life has existed between these two wins. It hurts to think about how long the city has waited to see a single measly playoff victory.
Good for you, Bengals. I am so happy you gave your fans something to be proud of.
Now that the Bengals have finally broken through the wall, let’s look at some of the other active playoff depression streaks. If I could live long enough to see the Bengals finally win, then surely some of these should break within the next decade.
Longest playoff drought – The New York Jets, 2011 – The Jets have officially lasted a full decade since they last appeared in the playoffs. The next closest team is actually the Broncos, at 2016. I assume the Broncos will probably hit the playoffs sometime, but the Jets might have a long road depending on whether Baby Boy Wilson grows up into a Big Boy QB. No team has gone past 20 years without making the playoffs though, so we can safely assume we shall see every team hit the playoffs in the next decade or so.
Longest Playoff Win Drought – The Lions officially take over from the Bengals at 30 years, not since 1992. So really, it barely changed outside the team involved. This one…doesn’t feel close to changing. While anything could happen (Hell, the Bengals kind of proved it this year), the Lions do not feel close. The longest gap between playoff wins historically is 38 years (poor Cardinals). The Bengals streak was 4th, and the Lions are about to tie their own 3rd place record with 31. Jesus Christ. The Lions waited 31 years for a single playoff win, and now they’ve waited at least another 30. Good lord. Do not root for the Lions. Detroit is cursed.
The Lions are also the longest Super Bowl drought, in the sense that they’ve existed the longest without winning one (62 years). The Cardinals and Vikings are right behind them at 61. Superbowls are hard to win, so I doubt we see a change here soon. Lots of teams haven’t reached that pinnacle yet.
How do you peg the Lions at 62 and the Cardinals at 61? The Cardinals are the oldest team in the NFL, and haven’t won a championship since 1947 (their ONLY win in over 125 years). The Lions last won in 1957.
And, obviously… neither has won a Super Bowl. Just the “NFL Championship”. Though the Lions are most def. the longest-running team to never even make it *to* the Super Bowl (tied with the Browns). I think the next longest drought to making it to the dance is… Jets?
And that tie is legally mandated bull shit since the current Browns really only existed since 1999, and the Original Browns have since won multiple Super Bowls as the Ravens.
Shhh…do you want to get Epstein’d?
Because that’s what the website I referenced told me
Superbowl headlines way in advance:
Bengals/Chiefs/Bills vs Bucs/Pack – “Young guns versus old guard”
Chiefs vs Bucs – “Rematch”
Chiefs vs Pack – “Who will Jake root for?”
Bills vs Bucs – “Does Tom Brady Own the Bills?”
Bengals vs 49ers – “Will the Bengals ever face another opponent in the Superbowl?”
Titans – “Can (team) stop King Henry?”
Rams or 49ers – “Is Stafford/Jimmy G good enough?”
Bucs/Pack/Chiefs – “Brady/Rodgers/Mahomes parade for two weeks.”
Bills/Bengals – “Allen/Burrow media coronation.”
Am I the only one who misses the superbowl in January and no rest “media” week in between? The NFL legitimately had to reschedule the SB into February because of 9/11. They then used that as a pretext to push the game ever further into February. I’d much prefer if they started the season earlier and wrapped it all up by the end of January.
I’ve always hated the two week lag before the Super Bowl. It kills momentum a bit and makes whatever the narrative/stories leading to the Super Bowl be more tiresome as they have another week to get beat into the ground. But I’ve made peace with the Super Bowl being in February. For me that at least holds off non-stop draft talk a bit and shortens the dead zone until Baseball (though if I still followed the NBA closely this wouldn’t be an issue).
Agreed. The media frenzy for 2 weeks (especially dependent on which teams/QBs are playing) is insufferable but even then it beats any and all draft talk. I’m getting sick realizing just how close we are to Mock Draft season.
I feel like part of the reason for less blowouts and repeat champions has to do with that 2 week lag, as the old way gave a huge advantage to dominant teams and repeat visitors (as all teams talk about how much there is to manage during Super Bowl week). I guess there are contradictory examples like the non-4-peat Bills too though.
Of course, the NFL could’ve shifted the season back a week when they added the 17th game this year, giving Labor Day weekend something fun to look forward to and wrapping up earlier. But they’re obsesessed with getting the Super Bowl to President’s Day weekend because they’re convinced that’s a big deal holiday. I’m super confused by that, as I’ve never had that day off in any job I’ve worked at across many industries, and that’s pretty standard unless you work at a bank or SOME schools.
At least they aren’t the Mariners. They haven’t even been to the playoffs since 2001, let alone won anything. Pretty sure that’s the longest drought in American sports. The Seahawks also went from 1984 to 2005 without a playoff win.
And the last time they made the playoffs, they broke the record for the most wins ever only to get yeeted from the playoffs in an early round.
Bills fan looks at Jets fans complaining about a 10 year playoff drought.
“Hey, maybe give Andy Dalton a call in 7 more years. It worked for us”
where are joe burrows small hands?
The number of teams that haven’t won a Super Bowl is substantial. Going back to league titles…..I knew a Lions fan that could remember 1957. And there’s plenty of old dudes that can remember the Bills winning in the AFL.
One would have to be like 85 to actually remember the Cardinals winning it all. The only person I know that rooted for the Cardinals while they were in Chicago…has to be pushing 70.
Born 1997; Can’t remember Miami’s last playoff win. Now they have the largest playoff victory drought in the AFC (2000-2001 season)
Hey it’s the hyper-passionate fan!
Maybe it’s just because I’m a Cleveland fan and thus experienced this recently, but this is shockingly heart-warming.
The over passionate fan is back!
I was 13 when the Bengals last won a playoff game. I don’t remember the game at all.
I started watching the Bengals and NFL football at age 10. The Bengals went to the Superbowl the next season. They had gone to 2 Superbowls in a decade, and made it to the playoffs 7 times in 20 years.
Then the 1990s…..
Next streak to break: Bengals have never won a road playoff game.
Yeesh, man. You missed Shula and Marino and Miami actually being relevant.
You seem to dislike the Steelers and not just Ben, so maybe this will offer some satisfying schadenfreude: The Steelers now own the longest stretch without a playoff win in the AFC North.
I hope we’re a more likable team now that Ben is finally retired. At least, I certainly hope he’s retired.
The Packers lost in the most hilariously Packers way possible. The defense allowed just 6 points, but vaunted Rodgers sucked as usual vs. The 49ers and the inept special teams continued to be inept and had several terrible gaffes, including allowing the only TD the 49ers scored. I’m a Packers fan and I say fuck Qaron Rodgers and his choking against the 49ers.
Honestly I’m shocked. Weren’t they supposed to wait till the NFCCG before choking?
Yeah, I expected them to at least make it there. The defense did well enough, but Rodgers could only look at Adams all game, despite other receivers being open and the STs were basically responsible for all 13 points that the 49ers scored. All season, Packers fans were worried that the STs being terrible might cost them in the playoffs, but the Packers ignored it and naturally it bit them on the ass.
The Jets could go 20 years without making the playoffs. After all the Mariners haven’t made it to the MLB playoffs since 2001.
Just 20 years? That would be a shame.
As a salty Browns fan after this season, I would love for the Rams to choke against the 49ers next week. I think an appropriate comic would be the city of Cleveland (or Mayfield [Better yet, Stefanski!]) taking a big ol’ deuce on top of him for the way he forced himself out. I’m still of the camp he never truly wanted to be there and purposefully played poorly in an attempt to get out.