The Draw Play

Once you hear it the first time, you can’t unhear it.

So if you haven’t watched the Cowboys all year (and come on, we know you have, they are on primetime every other week), you may have either noticed it yourself or had someone point it out to you. Cris Collinsworth talked about it during the Eagles game not too long ago, further cementing Collinsworth as the worst person alive. Dak’s pre-snap cadence includes the phrase “Here we go”, said in a…odd way, really dragging out the goooooooo in a deep pitch. It’s just the next “Omaha!” but with less charm.

The problem is it gets in your brain. Once you hear it it’s all you hear. Every Cowboys drive is a nightmare of Here we gooo Here we goooo here we goooo until you think your TV is skipping audio. The Cowboys will score and you’ll keep hearing Dak’s gravelly GOOOOOOO in the depths of your cerebellum. You’ll try to fall asleep, only to see a dark shadow in the corner of your bedroom jump out at you screaming HERE WE GOOOOOOO. Oh, thank god, it was just your coat falling off the doorframe after you left it hanging there.

Or was it. You drift back to sleep, closing your eyes. You try to count sheep and instead remember that time in high school where a girl totally was into you but you were stupid and you completely whiffed on noticing her advances and she left, confused and kinda sad, and you didn’t get why until right now. You jolt yourself back awake, sweating. You try and drift back to sleep. You remember earlier today when you stopped by the coffee shop and the barista said “Enjoy your drink!” and you replied, “You too!”. Embarassing. Okay. Third time is the charm. This time you are going to sleep. It’s time. Here we gooooo OH GOD DAMN IT HERE WE GOOOOO HERE WE GOOO

This blog post is getting away from me I better end it