Football Fan Types: The Fantasy Nut
“uh oh, Dave’s ranting about fantasy again”
Damn right I am. Fantasy is back and many drafts are happening right now which means these folks are coming back out of the woodwork from the offseason because now they have a reason to care again.
The Fantasy Fan is someone I’d imagine we all know many of. Many of us (NOT ME) are probably this guy to some extent these days. These guys portrayed here are worst of the lot. The ones who keep bringing it up apropos of nothing. Who take any play to mention to you how this is somehow related to their fantasy team. They spend half the game checking their phone for stats, and cheer at random moments when a player on their team does a thing. Then they tell you what that thing is and why it’s a big deal, even when you didn’t ask. They even sometimes try to get someone to change the channel so they can see a meaningless game that has a player on their team involved, even if that game they want to see is a horrible blowout. This is worse than murder and deserves the death penalty. Thankfully few people are this bad, but the fact that they even exist in the first place is a stain on the human race.
I’m honestly pretty tolerant of the Fantasy Fan in real life. Most of the people I hang with during games are big fantasy players and if they enjoy it, good for them. It’s not my thing, and I recognize I’m in the minority here. There comes a point though when people need to realize that No one gives a shit about your fantasy team. If the person you are talking to is not in your league, or an avid fantasy player them self and is actively engaged with you, please. Shut up. Football is a wonderful game with so much going on and so many topics worth discussion.
Example discussion topics!
-Rookies on your team, performances
-Strategy and expectations of your team
-trash talk
-Why are these refs so bad
-Why is Roger Goodell a terrible person
-London is such a bad idea
-Which game is the most interesting
-Who the best coach is
-how much Joe Buck totally sucks
-Who is the best RB/QB/WR/Defense in the NFL and why your friend is totally wrong
-Past glorys
-Past pains
-funny football related anecdotes
-That stupid comic you read online drawn by the guy who hates fantasy football
-Why your QB is the sexiest
-Johnny Manziel!
-which fans are the worst? Best? Do Titans fans exist?
-Jesus 12th man Seattle fans have gone so far up their own butts haven’t they?
-Man when Brady retires the Patriots are gonna tank, amirite?
-Bort
All of these topics plus so many more are all more interesting than your fantasy team.
-Jesus 12th man Seattle fans have gone so far up their own butts haven’t they?
As a Broncos fan living in Seattle, I can’t escape them, they’re like zombies. Yes, you got a good team now, well done, they’re not JESUS: the football team.
As a 49ers fan living in Seattle, …*sigh*
I’ve only ever FFed once, three seasons back. I was a Matt Moore away from the title. If I’d started him, I’d have won. As it was, I lost by 12 points.
SEE? EVERYTHING *IS* TONY ROMO’S FAULT!
Do Titans fans exist?
Yes, but there are very few of us left in the wild..
Are you the one guy that was the only fan outside waiting for titans tickets to go on sale? Can’t find a link, but a local reporter woke him up to talk to him as he had literally camped out in front of the ticket window to ensure he would be first in line. Turns out he was the only one in line. I lol’d, then I felt sad.
http://deadspin.com/tv-reporter-wakes-up-only-guy-camped-out-to-buy-titans-754340759
Poor guy.
I love fantasy football! Time to start a league with my friends, thanks for reminding me!
I couldn’t help but notice “Sexy Rexy” is not on the list of approved discussion topics.
“Why your QB is the sexiest”
You know what he means
BROWNS WIN!!! God, it feels good to say that.
“-Man when Brady retires the Patriots are gonna tank, amirite?”
If Matt Cassel is any indication, they should be fine if Bill Belichick is still around.
And have you seen Garrapolo? the dude is a monster
This is my second season doing Fantasy, and it has been really fun. It did change how I consume the games a little bit though. Also, I try really hard to not be THAT GUY when it comes to telling people about my fantasy team.
My general rule is: If someone doesn’t play Fantasy, I don’t talk about it with them. I have found generally people who do play enjoy talking about it, at least as long as you don’t beat it into the ground.
I only talk fantasy with people I know are interested or people who ask. Otherwise I keep focused on real-world football.
Also my quarterback is always the sexiest. Handsome Man Tom Brady can suck it.
Bort!
I’m gonna start PM’ing you a weekly fantasy wrap up.
We do exist, I think. Most of us probably are hiding in shame until we’re good again. By the way, I’m surprised we haven’t seen a comic about the glorious return of the Sex Cannon to the NFL
-Make terrible puns of players’ names.
-Turn players names into unrelated words
-Why is Roger Goodell a terrible person
He wants this:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ON-7v4qnHP8
Bort? Bort, Bort, Bort. BORT!
Joe buck sucks so much people in the st. Louis area have forgotten how awesome Jack was.
And the rest of the country forgot that Jack existed.
That’s sad. Jack Buck was an awesome announcer