ESPN takes out the trash
I don’t know what the hell is going on at ESPN but I like it. I guess Disney slashed their budgets or something and they decided to jettison all the old money windbags who have polluted the network for years. Cowherd is gone. Skip Bayless is on the way out. Cris Carter is being replaced by Randy Moss. Ray Lewis is also getting kicked out. Mike Ditka is no longer on Monday Night Countdown. Meanwhile SVP has gotten a bigger role (SVP owns) and now we get Charles Woodson and Matt Hasselbeck on the game coverage. These are positive changes as far as I’m concerned. Now they just have to get rid of Stephen A. Smith and things will be great again.
First up, Skip Bayless. Skip is taking the exact route as Colon Cowturd (See what I did there? I’m clever) and not getting his contract renewed and will apparently end up at Fox Sports 1. Remember when FS1 was going to be the “hip” and “cool” alternative to ESPN? Now they are literally just ESPN’s old garbage given new life. I’m fine with it, it’s nice that all the boogers of Bristol are getting flicked into the same crusty kleenex. Keeps them contained. Jason Whitlock is intolerable. Colin Cowherd is the gum you step in on your walk but don’t realize until you look at your shoe until later. Now Skip Bayless, the world’s biggest douche troll, can go to the nice farm upstate where he belongs so we can remember the good times. I never really hated Skip Bayless, personally. I mean, I didn’t like him, but meh. I never watched first take and mostly just accepted that Skip’s entire reason to exist was to give scorching hot takes meant to piss people off. He got mad money and mad attention by basically being the guy who walks into a bar full of idiots, says something to incite a ruckus, and then grins like an asshole when a fight breaks out. He was freakishly good at it and people still share his old tweets that ended up being wrong like he gives the slightest shit. You didn’t get the last laugh on Bayless by pointing out he was wrong about Manziel, he was laughing at you from the start.
As for Cris Carter, he was a big ol’ turd. I didn’t quite hate him but I found him annoying. His incessant whining every year he didn’t get inducted into the hall of fame really turned me off and I was hoping he’d never get voted in just to spite his whiny baby face. I liked it when he said Calvin Johnson wasn’t elite and then Calvin Johnson took him to school. At least he owned up to being wrong. Carter could have stayed on and I’d have been mostly fine with it, but Randy Moss is awesome so get out, Graduel. (That’s his real name)
I might be the happiest about Ray Lewis leaving. Ray Lewis added absolutely nothing to ESPN and it’s telling because of how quickly they ousted him. He’d wear stupid hats and spend his entire time preaching and passionately screaming nonsense at the cameras while the rest of the hosts would awkwardly sit there waiting for him to finish his latest butt powered word-jumble. I haven’t even heard a politician who could say as little so passionately as Ray Lewis. I would turn the channel during segments that featured Lewis simply because of how terrible he was to listen to. Now instead of Father McCoverUpMurder we get Charles Woodson (YAY! Charles is the best!) and Matt Hasselbeck, who is legitimately an awesome guy and always funny.
Seriously ESPN fire Stephen A. Smith and I might genuinely like you again.
Now if only cbs could Phil Simms and Jim Nantz put Greg Gumbel and the guy that works with Dan Fouts in the #1 team for football and fox replace joe buck and troy Aikman with Gus Johnson and literally anyone else for their #1 team
Like Dick Stockton
Arena football time (I’ll get to the latest storm embarrassment later)
First game was from Saturday; Jacksonville (2-4) will always make a game exciting, no matter who their playing. In this case it was the Gladiators (2-4) in Cleveland. Jacksonville was up 33-14 to start the 4th quarter; Cleveland won 41-40.
Game 2 saw something that I thought I would never actually see happen. ARIZONA LOST. It was magical to see the Arena League version of the Patriots actually lose. It wasn’t some lucky bounce off the net or a bad call by the refs, it was a 3-possession smack as (6-0) Orlando booted (5-1) ‘Zona down 77-59 in their home to become the best team in the season so far.
I’ll save Tampa for the next comment, leaving with the (3-3) LA KISS beating a bad team that’s bad, crushing (0-5) Portland 66-27, giving the Monday night home team 2 victories on the night. In any other season, Portland would easily be the worst team in the league, but the 2016 storm exist.
The only positive from last night’s Storm game: (0-5) Tampa scored the first 10 points of the game on the road against the (5-1) Philly Soul.
Final score: Soul: 47; Storm: 17.
Yes, Tampa’s offense got worse, failing to score 20 points. THEY COULDN’T SCORE 20 POINTS IN A GAME WHERE EVERYONE ELSE SCORES 50. Their defense isn’t the problem, as they actually kept Tampa in a game, forced several turnovers and gave the Storm offense chances to score from inside the Soul’s 10 yard-lines. Well, the secondary isn’t a problem because the defensive line got their first sack of the season last night, while Philly gave up their first sack of 2016 yesterday. In only 5 games, Tampa’s wet paper of an offensive line has given up over 20 sacks. Going back to the great field position tampa was given by the secondary, they ended with 2 touchdowns, 1 pick-six, and 3 “4th and 20s” that led to turnover on downs. Tampa did kick a field goal, but that was on the first drive of the game on a 4th and goal from the 6. Going for a field goal in Arena is like drop kicking in the NFL; useless. The only time kicking a field goal is acceptable is if you’re backed up to your own endzone with 4th and 20, it’s the last play of the first half and you have over half of the 50-yard field to go, and if you’re down by 3 or less points with 1 second left in regulation when you have to cover more than 30 yards. By doing it 6 yards away from a touchdown with 14 minutes remaining in the first quarter, tampa threw in the towel with 59 minutes to still be played. This is probably the most telling stat of them all:
Yards for storm recievers: 125 on 15 catches for 2 TDs.
Yards for soul defenders: 87 on 2 pick-sixes.
The storm are the first team since the 1996 Texas Terror (1-13) to score less than 30 points in 5 straight games. Next week Tampa goes to Orlando.
What’s your exact reason of why you hate Cowherd?
He has an entire rant on Cowherd
Here’s his Cowherd rant. It’s pretty spot-on.
http://www.thedrawplay.com/comic/a-reason-to-live/
Some good points about why he’s a jerk, but I don’t see drawing the line between Cowherd and Bayless. At least Cowherd actually admits when he’s wrong (usually). Yeah he’s more of an ass directly to other people (especially callers), but he’s basically just doing a poor man’s Jim Rome routine. I’d be curious to know what you all think of him?
Personally, Colin earned my semi/grudging respect after the 07 Super Bowl. The 2 week buildup was full of “Pats are gonna crush it” from him, like everyone else, but after the game he was one of the quickest and most passionate to argue that the Giants played the better game, deserved the win, and that he was 100% wrong
But yeah he definitely is an ass. So I can see why he’d bug you, but then you gotta add Jim Rome to that list too, who is also pretty rude to callers but is even more stubborn in his opinions. Though at least Rome is a dick to athletes sometimes too, and that’s usually entertaining
Because everyone else hates him. He has unpopular opinions.
I don’t mind him, just answering the question
I think it’s more that CC expresses his opinions in an obnoxious way, and is usually an ass to his callers. Fair enough, those aren’t usually good qualities in a person. But neither is being a contrarian just for ratings (Bayless), or refusing to budge on your opinions (Graziano). At least Cowherd has a bit of journalistic integrity, and that alone puts him higher in my book than a number of other ESPN personalities
Dunno how much empathy his callers deserve either… it’s not like someone is forcing them to call in. They know what CC is like and what they’re getting into. Projecting some “this is their only outlet” onto them seems kind of insulting
Have they mentioned who will be doing MNF yet? For that matter, why didn’t NBC take Gruden and Tirico as a package deal? Gruden is far superior to Collinsworthless.
Chris Collinsworth is a great announcer. Wtf are you talking about?
I don’t like him much either. I still can’t believe he won’t admit he screwed up the Buttfumble.
Ray Lewis’ facial expressions made my day. Thank you.
I dont have a problem with Skip or Stephan A Smith. Used to like their show because I like to watch people debate. But it got pretty clear, even around the industry, that the entire things a bit. They do it for the show and they don’t care if they’re right or wrong as long as they disagree. I’d hear other analysts snicker alot the show basically being the sports version of wrestling.
Cowherd is the worst. He’s a prick. He thinks he’s clever and funny and edgy. He says dumb shit and then lets people call into his show, and when they call him out on the dumb shit he says he just hangs up them and snickers. His name should be Coward, because he’s afraid some rando off the street might know more about sports than him on his own show.
Hate to be the guy who told Ray Lewis he’s fired
Yeah I could se the Ray firing from a mile away. There was a time before Ray’s retirement and just after (before he started commentating) that I thought he might make a good color commentator. He seemed to be eloquent in interviews and spoke passionately and confidently. However from the first time I was him at the desk my opinion totally flipped. He instantly look uncomfortable, uninformed and just plain lost. You could tell the other hosts were silently cringing each time they asked his opinion on a given subject. Ray should probably go back to preaching or crying because those are two things we’re pretty damn sure he’s still good at…
Tragic they replaced the occasionally moderately tolerable Carter with the always intolerable douchehat Moss. The show’s still unwatchable …
Hire Peyton Manning to replace the human garbage pile that is Chris Berman, and you’ve got yourself a dream team working NFL coverage for ESPN.
I don’t have the vitriol for Berman that apparently everyone else does. That said I’m not convinced that Payton would actually make a great commentator. I feel he would end up being a lot like Marino (who was also fired from sports-talking) where he blandly and straight facedly nods and agrees with his co-host while deep in thought about the glory days and how all these QBs today are terrible… I think he’d be mediocre at best.
I don’t hate Berman either. He’s annoying but he’s such a part of ESPN that I don’t know if it would feel like ESPN without him there. He’s like the weird professor with tenure at the university that no one wants to take an actual class with but everyone has a story about him.
Exactly. I know he isn’t the most knowledgeable or accurate presenter, and he’s drunk or half asleep often (not unlike Ditka). But all the grunts and funny little noises he makes as well as his generally affable demeanor (most of the time) makes him funny to watch if not fun…
Agreed. I’ve always liked Berman. He’s the fan’s broadcaster. He seems to understand what it is to be a fan and though his love for the Bills isn’t hidden, it isn’t annoyingly bias either. I also like his enthusiastic way of commentating each gameday’s highlights.
Put Berman and TJ back on primetime an all is fine, because his puns and catchphrases work in short bursts like 2-4 minute game highlights, but not a 2 hour pregame show
Yeah well 2 hour pregame shows are a problem on their own, a bunch of oversold bloviating and a waste of time…
I’ve always envisioned Peyton coaching after retiring as a player. I don’t think he’ll ever do much more than guest appearances on TV. Dumbing down his level of knowledge of the game for the general public just doesn’t sound like something he’d enjoy more than being on the practice field mentoring and coaching young players.
I think he will definitely be either a coach or front office executive.
FS1 was always going to have a tough row to hoe, and I think they finally landed on something that wasn’t terrible with Jay and Dan. But Horowitz is a one-trick pony with the trash mouth commentators, and it’ll blow up in their face.
Onrait, O’Toole, Nolan… stay strong.
I feel bad for Katie Nolan having to share a channel with the rest of those pompous windbags though, cause she’s terrific. Basically the only reason to watch FS1.
I will miss how Cris Carter used to show up on Mike & Mike wearing shirts that he clearly stole from the set of a Muppets production.
Don’t forget about Mike Tirico leaving MNF to join NBC. Have an opinion on that by any chance? I always liked Tirico, he and John had the oddest chemistry but it was kinda funny to watch.
What they need is to get the guy who yells out the pats games. And have him to every game. The NFL would have to restructure the scheduling so he could cover every game but it would be worth it.
Scott Zolack is your typical homer color commentary radio guy (Dave Lapham is the same for the Bengals) who, while very talented and entertaining, only works being the homer color commentary radio guy, no more.
I miss Craig Killborne
Randy Moss is replacing them. #straightcashhomie
Considering when FS1 started they dedicated 5 hours a day to an actual clueless moron (Mike Francesa), Cowherd and Skip are improvements.
I like Cowherd because he recognizes that there is a world beyond sports.
Skip is still an excellent writer, he just isn’t good on TV, though I think Stephen A actually made him worse.
I think Randy Moss left because having to work with Micheal strahan every week was crushing his soul
I’ll save my excitement for when Joe Buck isn’t covering NFL games anymore.