Bojohn Elway Wakes Up With Regrets
I can’t remember if I ever uploaded this here but if you haven’t seen it on my social media here is a thing I made last season that I thought was funny. Honestly wish I thought of it sooner.
Anyway that’s just how I’m gonna picture John Elway from now till forever.
Bojohn is doing his absolute best to ruin the goodwill the city of Denver still has left for him. Early Wednesday morning we suddenly got the first major news of the offseason that wasn’t Antonio Brown drama (I’ll get to that someday I swear). John Elway has traded a 4th round pick to Baltimore for what remains of Joe Flacco. Well, that answered one big offseason QB question!
It’s not…a terrible move? From a football standpoint it could certainly be worse. It’s hard to tell what Joe has left in the tank. He’s spent so much time hurt and Baltimore clearly wanted to move on. He’s 34 but a fresh plate might be enough to generate some decent football before the end. After all it worked for Peyton Manning in Denver, didn’t it?
But of course that’s the problem. Elite jokes aside, Flacco is not Manning and it’s hard to see this move as Elway doing anything but attempting to capture the magic of the one good move he’s made so far. Outside managing to woo one of the greatest quarterbacks to ever play the game, Elway’s ability to judge QBs has been exceptionally poor. Trevor Siemian had all the potential of a career journeyman. Paxton Lynch was an absolute bust of the highest order, and is currently a Seattle Seahawk after straight up missing all last year. He missed last year because he is butt. He resigned Brock Osweiler after losing him the first time, and Brock Osweiler is also butt. He’s also in Miami after he proved to still be butt. Swag Kelly was a thing that happened, sort of. Not really, but I wanted to mention Swag Kelly.
Last year he ditched the Semen for 1 year wonder Case Keenum. Case Keenum proved to be fools gold and was, at best, mediocre. You’d be forgiven if you straight up forgot who was even quarterbacking the Broncos last year. I did several times. Now, after 2 seasons of new QBs, we are settled in for another. This time a possible washup who has essentially put up extremely similar numbers to Keenum over his past few seasons. They also took on his stupid money fort contract to go with him.
I like Joe Flacco and I like new coach Vic Fangio. Honestly if Elway wasn’t in charge I’d like the Broncos a lot and root for them. I hate Elway though, with his big teeth and his smug face and how back in the 90’s he rode Terrell Davis to a Super Bowl. As long as Elway is there, I wish failure on the man. They likely won’t get past the Chargers or Chiefs anyway. Can’t wait to see what happens with Flacco in charge. Now I have to get used to drawing ol’ Flacco in orange. That’s gonna be weird, man.
Edit: Lol’n hard at the people concerned that the mirror isn’t drawn as accurate as it could be in a gag comic with a horse man vomiting in a bathtub after eating absinthe salts
EDIT 2: I am on an astounding injury streak lately. Two weeks after finally feeling like myself after dealing with the bruised ribs from the car accident I have gone and thrown my back out. I cant really sit in my normal working position yet so no comic today, hopefully Ill be good enough for at least a checkdown Wed.
I’ve been fielding this one from friends a lot, obviously. I don’t think that Elway has brought Flacco in with eyes on the Super Bowl, in all honesty. I mean outwardly he’ll say he has that in mind, because to admit otherwise in public would cause any GM to be run out of town. But when you think about it, Denver’s receivers are a young, inexperienced corps (aside from Sanders, whose status is still unknown). They’re not going to learn much from Case “My Favourite Target Wears Green and White and is Painted On The Field” Keenum. Flacco coming in brings a wealth of experience about routes, timing etc. Considering that this coming draft isn’t looking super hot for QBs either, Denver needs a good stopgap that can teach people a few things.
That’s my take on it anyway. I’m often wrong.
Back in the nineties I won a couple suuper bowls
I’m BoJohn, Bojohn the horseman
Don’t act like yoouuuu don’t know!
Awesome. This might surpass Don’t Care Bear as my favorite character ever…
Elway is the mane reason that the Broncos had back-to-back losing seasons for the first time since the 70s. Trotting out Flacco is unlikely to change that, and now the team is saddled with his massive contract.
“Mane” reason. Nice!
“Mane.” Lol
And “saddled” too!
Don’t forget “trotting.”
“mane” “trotting” “saddled” “Elway” – Some clever horseplay you got going.
denver fans are going to shout themselves hoarse champing at the bit for a stable qb situation but elway will never clear that hurdle.
The contract isn’t as bad as you think. The signing bonus doesn’t travel and none of the salary is guaranteed, so the Broncos basically have him for one year at $18.5M with walkaway options the next two years at market rate for a starting QB. I honestly thought the Ravens could have gotten a 2 or a 3, given how reasonable the remainder of the contract would be for the receiving team, so good on the Broncos for only giving up a 4 for him.
So mirrors don’t work that way.
Nothing like solidifying your legacy by continually bringing in shitty QB’s who make the fans miss you even more
Baltimore could have gotten more from this. A fourth-round pick!?!?! WTF! Get like a 2nd to 3rd round pick! C’mon Baltimore. Joe Flacco is better than Lamer Jackson. Yes, it is spelled Lamer. He can throw, unlike Jackson. Shout out to Carson Terrell.
From who?
They are lucky they got anything, they were going to just release him.
And Flacco is lucky he got traded because no one was going to pay him what his current contract gives him.
He was MVP of super bowl 47. The fourth round is baaad. Get a third-round pick. The third round is respectable. Jeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeez. Another shout out to Carson Terrell.
Minor nitpick, but Flacco’s mirror image is a little off from how he’s standing and we’d be seeing the “co” part of his name and not “Fl”.
literally not worth the tcp checksums on the packets involved in posting this comment
And your reply is even less worthy of the bytes it takes up. Especially since you’re too lazy to use capitals or any kind of grammar.
nitpicking grammar (how does one “not use any kind of grammar”, is that like a comment with nothing but blank space) as one’s core argument to recover from a meaningless op that even the author of the comic edited his piece to bash: the literal very last troll refuge
i embrace my comments vapidity but at the moment im more intrigued by this hill youve chosen to die on, so please tell us more about how mirrors work
I’m usually okay with grammar and spelling nitpicks or factual errors being pointed out but when it’s pedantic criticism about a tiny background detail that isn’t even relevant to the joke then it’s pretty ridiculous and I don’t care about fixing it
Good for you, Dave. It would have driven me nuts if I were in your position
im usually that grammar troll tho, lolololol
i will readily admit to being a hypocritical asshole, its how i do
I did say it was a minor nitpick. But since you’ve decided it was a big deal…
Even though you could see the punchline coming, this comic made me laugh — awesome execution (down to the spew cloud in the tub….)
The Bronco’s got fleeced on this one even though it’s a 4th round pick. I would assume they cut Keenum at some point this off season so not only do you now have Flacco’s monster contract on the books, which pays out more than Keenum’s this year, they now deal with the dead money left from cutting Keenum. The Raven’s got paid to clean house.
elway wuz rite about tebow “tebowing” tebow so i forever give him a pass
The only way this is a good idea is if:
1) We cut Keenum
2) Flacco takes a paycut to the point where he’s barely being paid more than a good backup
3) We draft a quarterback in the first round
If ALL of those things happen then I can believe this is just Elway trying to make moves for cap space and he isn’t seriously considering Flacco as a team leader. Elway’s tenure as GM has been mind boggling because he seems to have an eye for talent for every position other than the one he played.
Keenum will be cut or traded, but why would Flacco take a pay cut?
What’s Denver going to do, cut him? They just gave up a 4th for him.
Flacco would need to take a massive paycut to offset cutting Keenum since it would currently cost the Broncos 10m in cap next season. It’s kind of a longshot that Flacco would take the paycut at this point as it wasn’t part of the trade deal unless we don’t know all the details of the trade. Those types of talks usual come up as a team is trading for a player.
Keenum’s cap hit in 2019 is $21mil, with a dead cap of $10mil.
Flacco’s cap hit in 2019 is only $18.5mil. That’s workable.
Denver clearly feels there are other teams who would be interested in him, or they would have waited for him to be cut, saving the draft pick and possibly getting him for lower money. So I think there is zero chance he takes less for 2019, unless they redo his whole contract to guarantee him some money.
If a pay cut for Flacco isn’t part of this deal then it’s a bad deal. Flacco’s barely an upgrade over Keenum, if an upgrade at all. He’s not worth a 4th rounder unless we’re getting cap space out of this.
1) Yes
2) Yes
3) No. No no no no no no no no no no no. No.
If Denver drafts anything but a high-quality nose tackle or a premier left tackle, they are doing things wrong. If their second round is anything but a high-quality nose tackle, defensive end, or anything on the offensive line, they are wrong. Repeat for the third round. Fourth round, they can go fishing for other positions.
John Elway’s greatest sin as a GM (and something along the 28 GMs greatest sins) is not focusing on the Offensive and Defensive lines. I love Von Miller. Chris Harris is my favorite Bronco since Champ Bailey (and favorite career Bronco since Elway). But skinny guys do their best when they have a line. Dave’s wrong: Elway didn’t ride TD to the Super Bowl wins. Rather, they both rode the best offensive line play (by a freaking MILE) in the NFL at the time to the Super Bowl. And in their Super Bowl 50 win, they had the best defensive line in the NFL, and 2nd best wasn’t particularly close. But Elway’s focused on stats-guys, and ignored the hidden 8/9.
If Denver actually hugely focuses on the line, things can turn around. Until then, they’ll founder and flail.
Also: Dave is 100% right about BoJack Hoseman being great. When you look at the premise and the animation style, it has no right whatsoever to be as good as it is, but it is the best show out there, regardless of medium.
The line was 10th in the NFL in sacks allowed last year, and it’ll be much better with Munchak in charge. The line is far from perfect and could use some work but it is not why Keenum was as bad as he was.
I don’t get why “Bojohn” is funny.
I feel dumb.
It’s a pun on the TV show, BoJack Horseman where the main character looks a lot like how Dave is drawing Elway.
Thank you. I never heard of this show.
It is the realest show on TV (well, netflix). It’s also a lot deeper than you’d expect, although it takes half of season 1 to start finding that groove.
If you have any issues with depression or anxiety or stuff like that the show’s portrayals of them hit home hard while also being silly
I wish Bojohn would have signed Cutler just for fun. That’s sitcom gold right there.
Well, Cutler is as unpopular in Denver as in Chicago. And that says something.
Can’t believe it took you that long to do this.
Someone pointed out that John Elway is starting to look like Gary Busy and it can’t be unseen. Maybe John Elways been replaced by Gary Busy and that explains his personnel moves.
From Noodle arms to No arms, via a collection of vaguely memorable purely because they were terrible QB’s
Are we going to admit it now that Elway has an unwritten agreement saying he has the job for life. because no GM in any other city would get away with being a Superbowl Winning legendary quarterback that cant actually judge the talent of other quarterbacks.
Its only a matter of time. Phil Simms is getting a contract in Denver next season
I can’t believe Flacco is 34. I remember when he and Matt Ryan were the fresh new face of QBs in the NFL. Lately everything I read makes me feel old. So very, very old.
No prob Dave. I feel like I’ve thrown my back out as many times as Nathan Peppermints has thrown to the other team. It sucks. Get well soon.
Last week I messed up my back picking up my kids because I wearing dress shoes.