Josh Harris Finds Out What He Bought
WHAT A MESS!
One of the things you learn when you first buy a house is how much shit is wrong with it. Sure, the inspection saw some things, and if you were lucky and pushy enough you got the seller to fix the worst problems. But then you move in and the first few months are you learning the quirks and issues that were overlooked and you spend every day in an anxious state because you spent all that money and you bought a piece of shit and oh my god how are you going to pay for these issues oh god oh god im a sucker fuck fuck fuck.
I’m sure Josh Harris was aware of the state of things in Washington. To a decent degree. He is already a team owner. But over the next year he’s going to have to contend with the actual extent of the mess Dan Snyder has left behind. A disgusting stadium. Broken facilities. A “damn good” culture. Dan Snyder left Josh Harris a lemon.
However, this does put Harris in an interesting place because he can pretty much rip it up at the crumbling foundation and build anew. I went into this briefly when I examined Harris a bit a month ago when the sale was a formality but not final, but there are a lot of questions that immediately come to mind now that a new guy is in the house. Magic Johnson (part of Harris’s group that bought the team) already teased that the new name might possibly change. He states that this will be examined in 2024. No changes are particularly likely this season as camp just started. I assume this year will be Harris making whatever office and business type changes he needs to make but will largely let the machine churn as normal until next offseason. That’s when we will likely get staff firings (Rivera is a dead man walking unless they win a playoff game IMO) and any big brand changes, and a possible stadium announcement.
Besides the tantalizing idea of the name changing again (something I am unfortunately doubting will happen because 3 name changes in 6 years is a lot of mess) the biggest question remains the stadium. FedEx is disgusting. Routinely voted at the bottom of any stadium list. Almost murdered Jalen Hurts when a railing fell down. It spilled greywater on fans. The field killed RG3’s career. It’s located in a shitty suburb outside the city that nobody likes going to. FedEx is a totaled car. They could pour millions into fixing it up, but why? It might be cheaper and smarter to just buy a new car. FedEx was opened in 1997, just before Snyder took over. It is a symbol of his tenure in so many shit-crusted ways. A new stadium will take a few years to materialize but I have zero doubt that it’s going to happen.
My personal wishes? I would like Dan Snyder boiled in a big cauldron of goat pee. More realistically? I want them to go back to Football Team but if they do change the name it’ll probably be to something brand new. I hope they actually keep the W logo though, I have grown to like it. The uniforms need to go back to the Skins days, just change the logo and the uniform is perfect. A new stadium located inside DC limits would be great. Not trotting out Sean Taylor’s death for sympathy points every 6 months would be great too.
Hopefully they go with Red Tails this time, something like Red Tails or Red Hawks. Commanders is just lame.
3 rebrands in 6 years is normally an awful look for any franchise, but I kind of get it here. Seems like they’re trying to just erase any trace of the enormous dumpster fire Snyder left behind and dumping the crappy Commanders branding that was clearly rushed out is the first step in doing that. I agree that they should go back to the ‘Skins template just with whatever new logo they make. Those uniforms were awesome and the only bad thing about the original name change.
What if they changed their name to Deadskins, and go with the old look, as has been suggested, but replace the Native American head with a decapitated Dan Snyder head? Lean into the whole “D. Snyder was the WORST in a collection of truly awful people, to the point that even THEY look at him and shudder” vibe.
Why is it you draw bald men without necks getting bonked so well?