The Dolphins Vs The Cold
Sing it with me friends:
Miami has the Dolphins, the middest football team!
They take the ball from goal to goal,
until it drops below 50.
Whether in the air or on the ground,
they always lose control!
So playing as a Dolphin,
you watch the Super Bowl!
Cuz they’re the
Miami Dolphins, Miami Dolphins! Miami Dolphins Are Some Bums!
Miami Dolphins, Miami Dolphins! Cheetah chose to run
It’s always a good sign when your number one wide-receiver says “I’m out bro” in his postgame interview. It’s an even better sign when your franchise feels the need to release a statement saying “hey, no, we aren’t firing anybody“. I was actually kind of surprised to remember that the previous two seasons under McDaniel featured playoff berths. Maybe because both times the fish were bumped out immediately in the wildcard round. By cold weather teams.
That seems to be a theme with the Dolphins. The Dolphins suck in cold weather. It was a trend so noticeable that McDaniel himself acknowledged the meme by wearing a shirt mocking it before the @Buffalo matchup earlier this season. The Dolphins managed to put up a fight in that game, yet they still lost. That game was 54′ (12′ c) degrees, according to Wikipedia.
The Dolphins would lose an important game in Green Bay later in the season during a 27′ (-3’c) degree game. They faced favorable balmy temps against San Fran, then another 54′ degree day against Cleveland where they got lucky in facing one of the worst teams in the sport. They would end the season in the Meadowlands for (hopefully) Rodgers in his last game. It was 34′ (1′ c) degrees. They shat the bed. Rodgers had a career day to remember to potentially go out smiling. Fuck the Miami Dolphins for giving him that.
McDaniel should be happy next year though. No matter what the weather happens to be, his seat should be nice and hot.
As a Fins fan since Marino, it is quite painful to basically know the outcome whenever they travel north.
I did love the Tannehill-era game @Pittsburgh where it snowed like crazy and Charles Clay denied the gods to bring the Dolphins a rare cold-weather win.
Hill saw that Denver had clinched and just flat-ass-out quit.
Starting to see a little of why KC got shot of him methinks.
The whole team quit. The Jets started driving right about the same time Denver was going up 21-0. Hill wasn’t even on the field at that point
Maybe, but Hill did it both physically and verbally. Don’t need rage-quitters.
The “I wish it were colder” shirt was back in 2022. The Bills had passed out in heatstroke and Miami was ribbing Bills fans about complaining about the weather and McDaniel was trolling.
The Bills have not lost to the Dolphins since that moment
I think McDaniel is a good offensive coordinator, or at least good at play design. But when it comes to actually managing a game and seemingly the locker room he’s been in over his head.
Yeah, it wasn’t even that bad that night. It was about 29 degrees. Great game, that was the back-and-forth game for the AFC East where Bass hit a game-winning field goal as time expired.
As a Fins fan since Culpepper (I was 2 when the Jags killed Marino) I miss Brian Flores so much. We have zero fucking spine. When we had Flores, we went 5-11 with a roster worse than the 08 Lions (37yo Fitzmagic was our leading rusher that year with under 250 yards) and ended the Pats dynasty, and that was after we started the year losing to the Ravens 59-0 & the Antonio Brown Pats 47-10. We didn’t have good talent but we had great heart and gave a crap. Even in Flores’ last season, he led the team (with help from Robert Hunt’s called-back fat guy TD lol) from 1-7 to finish 9-8 and we fired him because Stephen Ross (Miami’s owner) is a racist dipshit.
We could have beaten Buffalo in the 2022 wild card with undrafted rookie Skyler Thompson if McDaniel knew how to manage a playclock. Instead, Buffalo has made us their bitch just like KC has made Buffalo their bitch. Remember, it wasn’t Flores that told a clearly concussed Tua to “tough it out” in the butt punt game and threw Tua into Cincinnati to get knocked out and sent into a fencing position; it was McDaniel. I honestly rather have Adam Gase or better yet have kept the our interm coach from 2015; Dan Campbell because at least our situtation didn’t feel as hollow. Gase’s teams had Jay Ajayi running over everyone & the Miami Miracle. All McDaniel has is 70-20 & causing his QB to likely die from brain hemorrhaging at age 40.
Thanks for adding in celsius. I’m always confused with Fahrenheit temps, except 72 and -40.
16c is 61f, 10c is 50f, 20 c is room temp (68f), 30 c is 86f, 5 c is 41f
HTH, HAND
Long-time reader, first time poster, had to say this:
This is my favorite of your comic ‘templates’ and I always grin when I see the team vehicle. I still laugh at the Killer Bees one 🙂
Every time a new one comes out I have to read the previous ones, they are some of his best work.
It’s an advantage to be used to the heat too. If the season was spring-summer instead of fall-winter Miami would be a playoff powerhouse.
I always dreaded hot weather games in Miami during the Brady years, just as much as I was delighted to see southern teams come north in the winter.
hold the alt key and type 248 to get the ° symbol so you don’t have to use apostrophes. This can also be accessed via the character map.
Dig the Miami Dolphins #1 parody. Lee Ofman would probably be proud, given that you paid him as much as the Dolphins did for the song…
Out of all of your running gags, this is the one that I love the most. My favorite is the one with the Brady Pats going down to Miami, mainly for the Don’t Care Dolphin, but they’re all good.
I love the parody of the old Houston Oilers fight song. Which in itself was pretty silly already lol
A little late to this, but the fact that I just yesterday played an old 45 I was given of the Houston Oilers song – and checked in on this comic today, only to IMMEDIATELY hear the opening to that tune – feels like a high-five from the universe.
Texans by 3?